Feathers and Troubled Hearts
by MAVEN Hisakawa
Summary: If Sesshomaru's Tenseiga had been able to save the dying Kagura that day in the meadows, what would the future, 10 long years after Naraku's demise, be like for the silver-haired daiyoukai, the wind sorceress, and the human child, Rin, who had recently came of age and had chosen to return to her lord's side? Which of the two women would the great Lord Sesshomaru choose to be with?
1. Prologue: Jealousy

There was a spring in her steps as she ran out of her soon-to-be old home. The chores had just be finished, the house was clean to the last corner, the clothes were washed and dried, folded neatly in a pile by the cabinets, and she had stored the last of the firewood into the now-full wooden shed in their small backyard. Everything was set in place, exactly where she needed them to be.

Today was the day, after all, that she had long been waiting for: her 18th birthday, the day she comes of age.

Boisterous laughter filled the midday air - the sound of horse-hooves against the sun-bleached, hard-pressed dirt path in the middle of a busy crossroads could be heard from yards away. The sun was in clear view; no clouds blocked the piercing rays of sunshine. The birds were chirping, seemingly singing tunes that matched the young maiden's clear excitement. This was it, after all. After 10 long years of waiting, this was the day she announced her choice - the day she chooses the path to the rest of her life.

Clad in her signature kimono, her long, ebony-black hair tucked behind her ears, Rin felt ready - _more_ than ready, even. 10 years ago, after the fall of the demon Naraku, the demon lord Sesshomaru had left her to the care of the priestess Kaede and was told to remain still till the day she comes of age, when he would come back to hear her choice. On that day, she will have a choice to pick whether she'd choose to remain with her people and live out the rest of her life surrounded by her own kind at last, or if she'd choose to follow him once more, in a world of violence, fear, and uncertainty that was the core of demon kind.

Of course, Rin had her mind made up 10 years ago, long before Naraku had even fallen. There will always only be one place she truly belongs: next to him.

Much had changed with her in the last few years: she had grown a lot, for instance, and her perspectives were now different. What was once a small child is now a woman. She had grown taller than most girls her age, her once-rounded face slimmed down to a sculpted one, with well-defined cheek bones, round, full lips, and big, bright eyes that shone like the galaxy were in them. She was slim, toned, and slender, with voluptuous curves in all the right places. Her skin was flawless, baked to the perfect shade of light brown. She had matured well - and mother nature had been generous in giving her the perfect built befitting the title as the most beautiful woman in the village. She was built like nobility, tall and elegant, and had, of course, captured the heart of many from a very tender age.

But it wasn't just her body that had gone through a transformation.

She could never seem to pinpoint just when exactly the change had occurred: it came in a steady, gradual pace and she never quite realized it was happening until it was fully there. One day, she viewed the silver-haired _daiyoukai_ like some sort of angel she admired; her hero, her provider, her guardian - the next, she looked at him with longing and passion, spending a decent amount of her time in daydreams of a future she wished they could have together. The innocence in her childhood admiration had slowly faded away replaced by a feeling of desire, one that had taken her quite sometime to settle with herself, inter-personally. Despite it all, one thing remained a constant throughout the roller coaster of emotions in her troubled heart: Lord Sesshomaru is the center of it all, just like how it's always been.

With the wind blowing on her face, pushing her frizzy hair in all directions, she ran faster than she ever thought she could. Through the rice paddies, the bustling marketplace, the busy streets. Breathing hurt as she drew gasps of air from her tired lungs but she didn't care. After all, Lord Sesshomaru is waiting - waiting to hear the answer to the question no one's yet asked out loud: Which world is she going to choose?

Finally, she could see the clearing through the woodlands leading up to the Bone Eater's well. At the end of what felt like a long tunnel of green and trees, she could see his armored figure: long, silver hair draped elegantly on the spiked pauldron that covered his left shoulder, the white kimono that carried the crest of his family in reminder of his noble birth, the _sashinuki hakama_ that gathered at his ankles by his black ankle-high boots, and his signature mokomoko-sama that drags behind his right shoulder.

"Lord Sesshomaru!"

Her raspy breathing showed in her voice as she rested her hands on her bent knees, taking deep breaths as she reached him. He looked at her in mild confusion, his gold eyes inevitably scanning for signs of danger.

 _Why was she in such a rush?_

"Are you alright?"

She looked up at him from her bent position, dark brown eyes speaking volumes of her uncontainable excitement.

"Yes my lord! I just didn't want you to wait long, that's all!"

She took one last deep breath before straightening herself up, bowing her head slightly in perfect posture in revered greeting, as was customary in meeting someone of his social class. It wasn't the first time she's ever done it, but the demon lord still found this new habit of hers quite a curious one. They never had such formalities when she was a child, perhaps it was something that came with age? He wasn't sure. He's never raised a human child before her, after all.

He nodded his head slightly in response before turning his head away from her towards the corner of the well where, for the first time since she's arrive, Rin had realized a third person sat idly. She recognized her well - the short hair tied in a small bun pinned by two white feathers, the traditional dancer's _kimono_ with the whole right side removed, hanging from her yellow _obi_ sash, revealing the green basic _kosode_ underneath, and those piercing red eyes she's seen too many times before: Kagura of the Wind. Their eyes met in swift recognition and the wind sorceress raised her right hand in a half-wave.

"Yo."

 _Ah, that's right._

Kagura had survived the wrath of the spider, Naraku, with the help of Sesshomaru's Tenseiga. The day her poisoned heart was returned, the great demon lord had arrived just in time to save her life, an act she was more than grateful for. She herself and the Lady Kaede had taken it upon themselves to help with her recovery after the war for the _Shikon no Tama_ had ended; the miasma had spread from her very heart and had damaged her body tremendously. Even a demon like her had to take some time to regain her physical independence. Soon after she was able to fend for her own, the wind sorceress did exactly what she had long longed to do: to fly free and explore the world as she pleased. Since then, she hasn't seen her, although from the occasional visits from her Lord Sesshomaru and Jakken, she had overheard that the former incarnation of Naraku had joined up with the _daiyoukai_ in service of the Western Lands. She didn't think much of it then, but seeing her now with the demon lord by her side, Rin felt a foreign tug in her heart from an unfamiliar emotion she's yet to learn about.

"Lady Kagura."

She bowed slightly in greeting, an action that elicit a small chuckle from the older demon.

"What's with the formality? I don't remember you being this formal since the last time we met."

"I suppose not. I was a rather crude child, but I'm older now and I know better. It's only polite to show respect to my peers."

Rin added a small smile at the end of her sentence, hoping it would wipe away the awkward, uneasy feeling that's begun creeping up on her in the few seconds.

 _What is wrong with me? I've never felt like this around Kagura-sama before._

"I suppose. Anyhow, I just dropped by to greet you in person. I heard this age is monumental to humans. _Otanjoubi omedeto_ *." [*Happy Birthday]

" _Arigato*_!" [*Thank you]

She hoped the smile on her face looked as genuine as she hoped. There was no sincerity in it, but for now, she hoped it was enough. This was far from how she expected this day to turn out; while she knew most of her extravagant daydreams of a surprise proposal from the demon lord was far from reality, she had at least held expectations that it would a lot more... personal. Heartfelt. Sincere. She pictured this moment to be between him and her alone, discussing their future together, with her reciting the speech she's long planned and perfected at the back of her mind about how important he is to her and why she'd always choose him no matter what. Part of her even toyed with the idea that she might muster the courage to speak her mind and tell him how she felt about him after all these years, despite knowing the high likelihood for rejection. She had mentally prepared herself from likely scenarios, how she could say all the things she wanted to say given different possible circumstances. She had even expected the whiny imp to show, but this? This was something that never even crossed her mind as a possibility, let alone a reality.

Finally, the daiyoukai shifted. Reaching in from behind his mokomoko-sama, he pulled out a brown parcel, tied with a small, pink ribbon. Extending his clawed hand, he handed the small package to the young woman.

"This is for you."

She gingerly took the gift from his hand, carefully undoing the knots of the perfectly tied ribbon. Pulling the parcel packaging aside, it revealed a beautiful _kimono_ , much unlike any he had given her before. The craftsmanship was beyond exquisite: it looked hand-made, the perfect seams and impeccably centered patterns were obviously well planned out. The cloth was nothing short of immaculate - easily the finest silk she's ever seen. It was an alternating color of white and bright orange, as if a spoof of her childhood favorite _yukata_ , with embroidered cherry blossom patterns around the sleeves and collar, similar to the crest on his very own attire. It felt more personal compared to most of his previous gifts. He had obviously put a lot of thought into the making of such a personalized item, and knowing that gave Rin a weird-but-pleasant feeling in her stomach. A present like this must have costed a fortune, she realized.

"It's... beautiful. Thank you my lord!"

He nodded in response, a man of few words, as always.

As if on cue, their third companion stood up from her seat by the well, walking leisurely over to stand by the much taller dog demon.

"I suppose now's the time to ask the big question, no?", she chimed.

Rin didn't need the reminder; she hasn't forgotten. She inched forward, moving closer to the standing demon. Looking up at his beautiful face, the proximity revealed details to it she had always admired as a child: the magenta stripes on both his cheeks, the bangs that partially covered the crescent moon on his forehead, those deep, golden eyes framed perfectly by his well-defined features that marks both elegance and masculinity all at once on an almost porcelain-like complexion.

"Rin."

"Yes, my lord?"

"Have you made your choice?"

His body stiffened, but _very_ slightly, in what she assumed was anticipation. His face was just as stoic as always and he gave no visual hint or bias on an answer he wanted. He simply looked like he was asking for mere curiosity, but she knew better. She liked to think she's always known him best, even compared to Master Jaken. So she smiled - that classic smile she always showed him as a child. He looked at her with a small glimmer of hope in his eyes and she caught on to it; she knew exactly what he was hoping her answer would be, and it is.

"...I will always follow you, Lord Sesshomaru."

He nodded, his shoulders relaxing. She could hear the subtle hint of relief in his voice.

"I see."

In those short seconds - that solemn moment - Rin had almost forgotten Kagura was even there. She could only see him and the way his eyes looked right into her as if he could see through her very soul, into the deepest parts of her heart. Somehow, she wished he did - maybe that way, she wouldn't need to fumble around a way to confess her feelings for him.

But the earnest moment didn't last long as the wind _youkai_ rushed over, putting her arm on her shoulder with a gleeful smile on her face, calling her back to reality.

"Welcome back aboard! I guess we'll be traveling together from now on."

 _Wait, what?_

She diverted her gaze to the face right next to hers, looking straight at the deep red eyes that looked right back at her, blinking in subtle confusion.

 _Did she just say 'we'?_

"Lady Kagura is Lord Sesshomaru's travel companion?"

"Of course. I have been, for a while now. I'm sure you've heard I've come to serve as an ally of the West after I returned from my travels."

"I did, I suppose I just assumed you were stationed at the Western palace."

"I was, but travel had always been my calling. Jaken took charge of managing the palace in Sesshomaru's absence, so I decided to accompany him in his journey instead."

"I see..."

She curled her upper lip to keep herself from saying anything more. Not that she had much left to say but her mind was whirling with thoughts that only made her assume the _worst_ \- whatever the 'worst' was. She couldn't understand why, but she felt a pang of disappointment stab into her heart. She always liked Kagura, so it wasn't that she was disappointed to hear she was well - in fact, she was glad to hear about her return. They had a good relationship prior to her leaving in pursuit of her dreams for exploration, back when she was still a child. While the wind sorceress had never proactively engaged in attempting to keep contact after, she was happy to hear stories of her travels from third party accounts, even wishing her old friend could come and revisit the village every once in a while, but seeing her now gave her a much different feeling than she was hoping for. The heavy feeling that weighed on her upon seeing the demon lord with her grew even heavier at the knowledge that they had been traveling alone together for quite sometime.

 _Why did they even have to leave Ah-Uhn and Master Jaken behind?_

As if he felt her unease, the _daiyoukai_ interrupted the women's awkward reunion, his voice dragging her back to matters at hand.

"Do you need to make preparations for our departure?"

Returning her attention to him and ignoring the woman by her side, she went through a mental list of what she needed to do in the village before she leaves. There wasn't much, really. Lady Kaede and her friends - even the whole village - knew what today was and they all could have guessed what she was going to choose. She loved and cared for everyone, but her heart always belonged with the wandering demon lord. Preparations were established days before her coming of age and there were very few things left for her to do.

"I only need to inform everyone and grab personal belongings and some provisions, my lord."

He nodded in understanding.

"Very well. I shall return for you tomorrow at sundown. Be ready."

"I will!"

With that, he walked away just as he did each time after he visited. Turning his heels towards the deep woods past the well, he walked on a brisk pace, the gently breeze blowing through the thick mass of silky, silver hair. She stood still, feeling the pressure on her shoulders recede as Kagura pulled her arm back, walking swiftly behind the leaving the _daiyoukai,_ her bare feet making no noise against the green grass.

"I guess we'll you you tomorrow."

Rin stood there for a few minutes after the two figures vanished from sight, recalling the encounter just moments before. The news about Kagura was new to her, and the feeling of unfamiliar heaviness in her heart still lingered.

 _What is this feeling?_

The thought that her lord had traveled for weeks now - _alone_ \- with the wind sorceress left her with a surge of unfamiliar emotions. It hit her like a wave of all things foreign; somewhere in that tide of turbulent emotions, she felt a mix of helplessness, anger, disappointment, mild heartbreak, desperation, and _love_. It was corrosive, like the very poison in her lord's claws, worse than any negativity she had every felt. Like acid, it burned - and _oh, it burned deep_. Everything around her felt quiet while her head screamed in voices only she could hear, playing out every possible scenario of what their lonesome travels together could have been like, all alone with no one to _disturb_ them. It was maddening; and for a few minutes, she stood there, unsure of how to handle this feeling of uncertainty.

Finally, she turned around, walking back towards the village towards the crowded streets of the small town entrance, her wooden sandals clicking quietly against the rocky path, her mind grasping a new concept to her unrequited admiration to the demon lord.

"So this is what _jealousy_ feels like", she muttered under her breath.

* * *

A/N: This is my first attempt at a series and a love triangle. Despite the bias of the first chapter, the perspectives will switch on the next chapters after to create an actual balance between Rin and Kagura - I mean, story is kinda bland if you know how it's gonna end right? Even I haven't yet decided who it's going to be and I'm letting it flow as it goes on. Anyways, thanks for giving it a read! Reviews would be much appreciated as I do take into consideration reader's requests as to where the next chapters might lead! Thanks again!


	2. Chapter 1: Right Where I Belong

"Are you sure about this?"

He regarded her with concern, his tone clearly showed his uncertainty - lips drawn to a straight line. His gold-colored eyes, so similar to that of her lord's, stared her down with worry, his arms crossed against his chest. The half-demon was always distrustful of his brother's intentions, and given the _daiyoukai's_ past record of hate crimes against humanity and long years of strong dislike towards anyone who fraternize with humans, it was warranted. To Inuyasha, 10 years was too short a time for a demon to fully change perspectives, despite the irony of it coming from him.

"Of course. I've always planned to return to Lord Sesshomaru, you know that."

He hasn't changed much in the last 10 years - if he even changed at all. Still donned in the red robe of the Fire Rat, he looked just like he always did, albeit his face showed a tad bit more mature features than it once did. He grew slightly taller, but not nowhere near as tall as the Lord of the West. He insists demon grow spurts take longer to show and he'd get taller, but everyone else is convinced he's simply in denial - they all think he's as tall as he's ever going to get. He did, however, grew calmer - _wiser_ \- than he once was. What physical aspect of growth he might have lacked over the years due to the demon blood that ran through his veins, he made up in mental maturity. While some things will never change - like his perspective on his older brother - his actions, his words, and his decisions were chosen more carefully other than just sheer impulse, as what the old Inuyasha would have done, though perhaps, parenthood had a hand in it.

"Yeah I know, but still. You might want to rethink this. I mean, he's never up to anything good."

She simply smiled in response. While she can honestly say the brothers no longer _hate_ each other, they were nowhere near in 'good terms'. At the very least, they can exist for short while within a decent proximity of each other without one of them trying to kill the other, and that was progress enough.

"Don't listen to him, Rin. You know how he gets with Sesshomaru."

Kagome waved Inuyasha's comment off, flashing her a reassuring grin. The priestess sat across from her, folding the clothes she had helped her pluck off the drying line. Unlike her husband, she had gone through many physical changes that were nothing short of good: her body had matured, leaving a fine figure with a toned body and a slim physique, blessed with tasteful curves she could only assume Inuyasha was more than grateful for. Her hair was longer now and she apparently resembled the dead Kikyo in appearance more and more the older she became. She had always been a patient woman, but she had evolved into a new level of patience - as per the same case as Inuyasha, perhaps parenthood had a hand in that.

"I'm just saying", he chimed one last time before pushing the door of their home open and stepping outside, leaving the two women to talk in private.

"Don't worry so much about it. Just trust your gut. Besides, you know Sesshomaru better than any of us. If anyone could better understand his intentions, it's you."

The older priestess kept her gaze down, her attention focused on the laundry on her lap. She always had this strange way of folding clothes - something about a _'department store'_ style - that seemed to require more time and effort than the typical way people in their era did it, but to be fair, her intricate methods did prove to be neater and far more practical than the norm, in terms of presentation and keeping the clothes rather wrinkle free. With her small hands working her magic, she carefully laid the shirts on the wooden floor, shaking off the creases in the cloth before gently folding them in a symmetrical manner, beginning with the sleeves, then the bottom, then the collar, creating perfectly square shaped folds.

"I suppose you're right."

Rin hadn't yet told anyone about Kagura, but watching Kagome, she figured there's no better time than now to bring it up.

 _I mean, if anyone would understand, it would be her, right? After all, Inuyasha had Lady Kikyo in the past._

"Lady Kagome?"

"Yeah? What's up?"

She cleared her throat. The mere thought of its mention brought about the same turbulent emotions that plagued her mind just hours earlier.

"How did you feel about Lady Kikyo when she came back to Master Inuyasha?"

The priestess paused, lifting her gaze towards the young healer with a look of mild confusion and a hint of curiosity.

"Why do you ask?"

Rin shifted from her seat uncomfortably, feeling the pressure from her companion's questioning gaze.

"Curiosity, I suppose."

Kagome knew that wasn't the truth and she made herself a mental note to pester the girl later for the details, but for now, she decided to give her a response. Whatever the motive for the question might have been, it must be relevant to her meeting the demon lord earlier, that much the priestess understood.

"Well, a lot of things, I suppose."

She paused for a second, her mind replaying the past at the back of her mind. She recounted the day of Kikyo's reappearance, the moments shared between her and Inuyasha, those times she caught them alone together, talking about their past she didn't belong in. Kikyo held a part of the _hanyou's_ heart she can never truly reclaim. It belonged to Kikyo and her alone and the harsh truth it took her long to accept was the fact that no matter what she did, she could never overwrite the past they once shared. No amount of loving Inuyasha will erase the reality that he _loved_ Kikyo too - and he loved her first. And first loves can never be truly quite forgotten, especially not one as notable as his.

Her expression softened, her voice sounded solemn. She pulled the clothes off her lap, setting the down on the floor next to her as she turned her body to adjust her position, facing her companion better.

"Hurt was probably the majority of it. I knew so little of the part of his life with Kikyo but I knew enough to know he held her in a whole different platform of sentimentality than where he held me. He loved her, and for the longest time, she love her _more_. I was jealous and part of me was angry too - but neither of those really came close to that feeling of heartache knowing that he loved her _first_ and would likely love her forever, even long after she's gone."

"Did it ever stop you from loving him? From wanting to be with him?"

The older maiden giggled softly. Rin was just so innocent still.

"I wish. Unfortunately, love doesn't work that way. No matter how bleak it all looks, no matter how hopeless - you can't just turn around and turn the feeling off, you know?"

The young healer nodded in response and understanding. Somehow, she can kind of understand. 10 years of waiting for her lord had given her that experience. Some days, she missed him so much she wished she could turn it all off and stop waiting. At the back of her mind, she toyed with the idea of what life would be like if she stopped waiting for him and just decided to live her days out in the village - but the mere action of just about it felt like a betrayal to him and to herself. A future trapped in such normality felt bland and the idea of living the rest of her life out as a simple human felt like a never ending nightmare. She had been touched by the otherworldly; she could no longer turn back and find the customary life - marrying a nice, local boy and starting her own family in a quiet and peaceful village - to be anymore than a dull and monotonous last resort alternative.

"So what brought this on about? Did something happen?"

Subconsciously, her lips pursed and her teeth clenched as she the assumptions flooded her mind. She knew, after all, how Kagura felt about her lord. From the day he brought her back in his arms, weak and barely conscious - clinging to the _mokomoko-sama_ against his right chest, to the day she left, looking at the horizon _westward_ with hopeful eyes - Rin knew the _youkai_ loved the demon lord too. The realization gave her a burning sensation in her stomach and her jaw ached from the clenching of her own teeth. Perhaps it was the prolonged silence and the sudden stiffness in her posture that hinted the woman in front of her of the turmoil that raged in her heart.

"Rin?"

Her mind snapped back to reality, dragging her attention back to her companion.

"I'm sorry, I just..."

 _Just... what?_

 _What was she about to say?_

The priestess seemed to have understood.

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to."

She forced herself to smile, to reassure her friend of her intentions.

"Thank you, Lady Kagome. It's just that... Lady Kagura had returned, and I found out earlier she had been Lord Sesshomaru's primary travel companion for a whole now."

It took the _miko_ seconds to piece the puzzle pieces together. Even she noticed the way the wind sorceress looked at the dog demon; and who could blame her? He saved her life in more than one occasion, and even before that, she was convinced he was the only one who had the power to free her. And in a sense, he _did_.

"I'm sure everything is fine. Besides, you'd be joining them soon, so you'd be keeping them company. I wouldn't stress much about it."

 _She's right. She would be with her lord soon, so it wouldn't matter much anymore._

She gave out a small smile, accompanied by a shaky laughter. Parting her lips just slightly, she let out a small sigh of relief.

"You're right. Thank you, Lady Kagome."

"You're welcome! Kaede should be back soon, so you should definitely head out. I know we all anticipated this decision but I'm sure she'd be happy to hear the news from you herself."

"I will! Thank you!"

Rin gathered herself up, gracefully tucking the bottom of her kimono close as she swiftly stood up from her seat and headed for the exit. She had some preparations left to do and clothes in need of packing, which she had almost forgotten.

"Oh, and don't forget to pack some provisions!", the young priestess added as her companion darted casually out the door.

* * *

The next morning felt like it took ages to arrive. In anticipation, she found it hard to sleep even when she tried. Perhaps it was her excitement: after all, today is the day she rejoins her lord in his travels. Her excitement and enthusiasm was so much that she almost forgotten about Kagura's unwelcome presence in their soon-to-be trio.

As the sun began to rise, the sky lightens in streaks of pink and orange and clouds are lit from the bottom in a fiery glow. Sunrise intensifies with each minute, growing brighter and sharper as night was cast off. As the rising sun warms the early morning, the smell of greenery filled the air - dew drops from the night before evaporated into the warm air, and flower petals began to open, releasing their scent into the softly blowing breeze. The chirping of birds and the crowing of of roosters can be heard from miles away - nature's little melodies reminding her of the life she'll likely miss, even if just a little.

She recounted the items in her small sack bag, making sure for the 100th time that she had everything there she needed: extra set of clothes, her lord's latest gift, a comb, some matches Kagome had brought her from the modern world, some food and a few bags of chips - courtesy of Kagome, again -, and a book on medicinal herbs. Oddly. she had developed a unique liking to reading since after the _miko_ had taught her to read years back. While book were still a luxury reserved only for nobility in this era, she had gotten access to some from Kagome's personal collections, brought straight from her own era where she claims books were free to use from so-called ' _libraries_ '. The priestess' stories always made her wish she could see this world so different from her own, but alas, only Kagome and Inuyasha had been able to utilize the well, much to her utter disappointment.

She spent the rest of the day making sure the house was in perfect order, clean and neat, and went on to brush up on her studies regarding healing herbs and how to better recognize them.

They day flew by painfully slow - sundown came hardly quick enough, but when it finally did, her excitement was apparent.

As the sun lowers beyond the horizon, the colors of the sky changed to orange, pink and red. The light from the sunset left a fading warmth on her skin as the dusk approaches, bringing with it the cool night breeze and the dark, starry skies.

"Be sure to come visit every once in a while, child. And be careful. Though the spider had long been vanquished, there are other dangers the lurk in these woods."

The old woman gave her a long farewell embrace; one the taller Rin had to lean down for to reach. Lady Kaede had grown much older - in a few years, she would be hitting her 70's, and yet she still works like she always did, with little to no intentions of slowing down.

"I will, I promise."

The rest of her friends were in a line by her home; they all came to say goodbye. Sango and her lecherous monk of a husband, Miroku, both gave her tight embraces and their children she had helped raise in the last years offered her the same. While Kohaku was out on a job, his sister assured her he meant to say goodbye, though he was fairly certain they'd see each other again pretty soon - he did run into the Lord of the West fairly often, he says. Kirara purred softly against her ankle; the feline had been one of her favorite companions in the village over the years, perhaps because she felt more at ease in the company of demons, especially since she reminded her much of Ah-Uhn. Inuyasha still bore that judging look in face, arms still crossed against his chest but he surprisingly didn't say anything today, and she could only guess Kagome had a hand in it. The _miko_ stood by his side, carrying their child in her hands as she leaned forward towards Rin, planting a small kiss in the young healer's cheek.

"Good luck."

And then she set forth, heading straight towards the Bone Eater's well where her lord waited patiently.

The skies turned from orange and deep red to the darker hues of purples, blues, and grays, as she walked briskly through the paved roads, leaving the town behind her. Gradually, the stars began to show one-by-one and the sounds of civilization grew more distant, leaving the loud chirping crickets and the croaking of frogs to fill the solemn air as dusk approached. At the end of the dirt path through the tall trees, she could see the familiar clearing in the distance, and a tall, white-clad, silver-haired figure standing alone against the dried, stone well.

 _Lord Sesshomaru._

Hastening her pace, her heart beating wildly in her chest, she made her way through the woods towards the waiting _daiyoukai_. She could feel his golden eyes watch her as she neared and it did nothing but cause the pounding in her chest to grow wilder.

"Rin."

His voice was nostalgic, bringing about fond memories from a decade ago.

"Yes, my lord?"

Her question was met with a few seconds of empty silence. Slowly, he walked over - keeping those deep, gold eyes, locked on her very own. Stopping short, only a few inches away, he reached out a pale, clawed hand to her face, gently brushing a stray hair off her cheeks, tucking it behind her ear. She could feel the slight touch of his hand against her skin, leaving her with a tingling sensation, a dry mouth, and a fluttering stomach. His face was as calm as it's always been and his expression remained stoic and cold, giving away none of the emotions he actually felt, but his choice of gestures spoke volumes. There was warmth in his subtle actions and she had long learned to read his silent ways of speaking. He had always been a man of few words, but she never did mind. They stayed there for moments longer, just staring into each other's eyes wordlessly, before he dropped his hand casually back to his side, leaving the young healer with a sense of unfulfilled anticipation.

"We're leaving."

And with that, he turned around and started walking slower than his usual pace, leaving her room to easily catch up - a subtle hint she caught on to quickly and welcomed entirely. With a gleeful grin painted on her full, round lips, she jogged quietly to his left side, keeping his pace with ease.

Together, they walked away into the darkness, welcoming the majestic view of the clear evening sky in all its glory, the light from the disappearing village far below fading slowly with each further step they took.

 _Finally_ , she thought, _I'm right where I belong_.


	3. Chapter 2: The Game

Whether he'd ever admit to anyone but himself or not, the reality was that he missed her. True, he saw her often - bringing her gifts and listening to her stories - but it wasn't the same. Leaving her in the village meant that he could no long look forward to going _home_ where she was and being greeted by her cheerful smiles, musical laughter, and unusual optimism, but he knew it was the right call. The village was safe and his palace is, well, _debatable_. While he had quelled most of his father's former rivals, he was wise enough to know it wouldn't take long before someone else came after him to challenge his domain. His empire grew stronger by the day and so did his influence, but that only meant the invitation for rivalry grew stronger in turn. Between keeping his territory and palace safe, his mother's incessant rambling to pressure him into producing an heir, and the task of expansion of his kingdoms as was his father's ultimate dream, he had not the time to spend raising a fragile human child whilst ensuring her utmost safety. There was chaos where he went and his little ward deserved more than living in constant danger. With his choices laid out in front of him, it was a clear path he had to take: he _had_ to leave the girl behind.

But time flew and it flew _fast_.

One day, she was just a little girl following him around, picking daisies on their way, the next, she was a woman of immense beauty unlike no other. He had seen, been with, and bedded many pure blood demon women before - if only to understand men's stereotypical obsession with physical pleasure - yet none of them came close to the how beautiful his ward had matured to be, and somewhere inside him was a change he hasn't yet decided whether to consider an objectionable one. He visited her often - as often as time permitted - but despite that, he felt as if he never saw her enough. With each time he came and went, he came back to a different Rin than the one he left before, the way time affected humans was evident in her quick maturity. It would only be a matter of time till she was of age, and then the time to hear her final decision would come: the day he both dreaded and looked forward to all at once.

His lonesome journey came to a halt when Kagura offered to join him.

The bold, stubborn demon insisted on tagging along despite his unspoken protests, and since Jaken had been re-stationed to care for the palace in his absence (for the reason that Jaken knew his preferences well and could make proper decisions befitting his liking, having traveled with him for so long), the company wasn't completely unwelcome.

Their first travel together was to the South, in lieu of investigating a rumor that a conspiring party had gathered north of the southern borders to overthrow the dog demon's regime. While he found this news to be non-threatening, his council insisted on the execution of the perpetrators as a show of power and to serve as an example of their empire's intolerance towards treason. They left at the break of dawn, walking briskly through the pine forest that covered most of the western border.

"Are you always this quiet when you travel?", she asked after what seemed like hours of nothing but the sounds of woodlands.

He didn't answer; his choice of response was self-explanatory.

He could hear the soft sigh escape her darkly painted lips and the sound of ruffled cloth as she crossed her arms in front of her chest. Even without looking back, he could sense that smug look on her face, staring at the back of his head as if she was trying to drill a hole through his skull with her mere gaze alone.

They kept walking until they reached the edge of the forest, past the tightly knit trees, into a clearing up ahead. The could see a river only yards from where they stood, the crystal clear water winding through the woods like a ribbon of living turquoise, boldly flowing amid the green of the forest. Out of habit developed from traveling with his human ward, he decided to stop and rest, an action that was, though appreciated by his new companion, also came as a pleasant surprise. Kagura had pictured the demon lord to be much more... demanding.

With the pulsing heat of the midday sun, her skin glistening and the nape of her neck damp, her fingers undid the _obi_ on her waist, pulling it aside and letting her _kimono_ fall to the ground, leaving only her _kosode_ on. The unusual sound of linen against the dried rocks caused the demon lord to turn his head, only to be greeted by the sight an undressing woman only a few feet behind him. He regarded her with curiosity; she wasn't beautiful in the classical way, no flowing long locks or perfectly flawless skin, no piercing eyes of green. She was shorter than average and built with more slight and an hourglass figure, but in her ordinariness, she was stunning.

She raised her deep, blood-red eyes, meeting his observant stare with her very own, as if trying to comprehend just what goes on in the _daiyoukai's_ labyrinth of a mind. Their gazes locked for a few seconds, neither seemed interested in back down.

Finally, the wind sorceress shrugged turned her gaze back to herself, loosening the small sash that held her _kosode_ close. The cloth hang loose on her ivory skin, her chest partially naked but for her breasts, as part of her untied undershirt lightly covered the sides of her torso. Reaching up at her hair, she pulled her two feathers off with careful fingers, placing them in a neat pile on top of her crudely folded clothes laying by her bare feet. Gingerly, she took small steps towards the running water, dipping her feet slowly against the weak current. Slowly, she walked deeper in, letting the cascade of deep, blue water cool her sweaty body and run through her short, tangled hair.

He stood in silence for a minute or two, observing, before walking over by a huge tree a few feet back, and seating himself against it's rough bark, hands to his side, his eyes still locked on the bathing woman. Out of all the demons he's ever been around with, both male and female, he's never been around one so casually... uncaring. Most women would - regardless of species - would have been uncomfortable undressing around a man; _or does she not consider him as one?_

The theory had left him with a feeling of annoyance and utmost displeasure. His eyes narrowed, and his posture went rigid.

 _Is she too comfortable around him because she didn't think of him as a man?_

"Why don't you join me? I imagine its even worse for you, lugging all that armor around. The water's perfect."

She didn't even bother turning around to look at him as she spoke, and he was beginning to take her unconscious actions as a personal insult. He said nothing back; not because he had no come back for her halfhearted invitation, but mostly because he didn't want to say too much and give away his bruised ego. He just watched her in silence, convincing himself his shameless staring was for the purpose of mere observations, _not_ because of her understated beauty; one that she was so disarmingly unaware of.

After what felt like like hours, she walked out of the water towards the rocky shore, sharp stones underfoot. She was dripping for head to toe, the corners of her breasts showing even more than before as her _kosode_ slid partially off her upper body. Her soaked, jet black hair stuck to her face, something she hopelessly tried to remedy by tucking the clumps of heavy wet strands behind her pointy ears. She regarded her companion with little care, picking up her discarded clothing in one hand as she walked over to him with the intentions of hanging her wet clothing to the branches of the tree where he sat, allowing for her to use her wind to dry them off faster.

Her aloof behavior did nothing but fuel the primal rage of mixed emotions brewing deep inside his gut. From a wounded pride of a self-depicted assumption to something else entirely he hasn't quite yet pinpointed, the silver-haired demon felt his chest tighten, his balled fist and bone-white knuckles speaking loudly in defiance of his stoic, deadpan expression.

As she got closer - her soaked body so close to his that he could clearly smell the minty oils on her hair and those flowery human perfumes she grew fond of wearing, somewhere inside of him, something broke. Perhaps it was the sweet smells that overwhelmed his senses, or maybe it was the sensual way she looked with the wet cloth stuck so closely to her body, highlighting the figure he couldn't help but admire m- but something tipped him right at the edge where his body acted on it's own accord, pulling her hand roughly from where he sat, dragging her to the grassy earth with ease and speed that she barely even knew what hit her until she was looking up at a stream of silver so close to her face, her wide, surprised eyes gawking at his calm, golden hues burning with an almost uncontrollable, primal fire that shook her very core. In a flash, he was on top of her: clawed hands pinning her small body to the green grass as he knelt over her hips, one hand holding both of hers over her head, his free hand holding his looming figure next to her cheek. She let out ragged breathing, her mind haven't yet caught on to her current situation.

"W-What are you doing?!"

He could hear the panic in her voice as it cracked slightly when she spoke. His heightened senses could feel the pounding heartbeat in her endowed chest.

"What are _you_ doing?"

She blinked, trying to wash away her feeling of surprise and regain her sense of calm - which was admittedly far harder in that situation than she'd have thought it'd be.

True, she was _teasing_ on purpose - not that 'tease' would have necessarily been the word she would have used up until that moment. Her admiration and romantic interests for the _daiyoukai_ had always been out in the open, albeit she had not openly and directly addressed it, but he had shown no interest for any woman in the years she's known him, and part of her wondered if maybe perhaps he was into... _other things_. She found this opening he had provided her to be an interesting opportunity to test her theory, and when he had shown no reaction at all, she had began to accept her hypothesis might be a little more than accurate.

But it wasn't that he didn't react, because he certainly did. _No_ , it was only that she didn't know him well enough to see the subtle hints: his clenched fists, his rigid posture, his pacing heartbeat, and those sharp eyes that eyed her with lurking anticipation - she missed it all and now she's learning the price.

"I wasn't doing anything. But you certainly are."

Kagura had regained her composure and she was back in the game; calculated and stoic just like her opponent. His unexpectedly forceful response weren't completely unwarranted and definitely not unwelcome, and so she played her part. Raising one leg up, her wet skirt falling high up her thighs, she made a risky move, testing just how far she can test the prideful demon lord. She had never seen him lose his control and the opportunity to toy with him like this, in his state of lustful powerlessness was beyond amusing, and she had only gotten started. With him this close to her, she could see the details to his physique she hadn't noticed before; she could smell tinge of mint in his breath, see the honey-colored lining to his heterochromic gold eyes, feel the pace of his beating heart. His silver hair glowed bright, single strands seemingly reflecting sunlight like pieces of glass. For a moment, she wondered just how far he would go if she pushed him. Would he force himself onto her? Would he stop right before the final act and pretend nothing happened? Would he try and seduce her? (Not that she could even picture that ever happening). Can she even push him any further at all, to the point of no return?

She didn't have to wonder long.

His nails dig deep into her wrists, the tightness of his grip slightly numbing her fingertips. He leaned closer, stopping short a few inches from the bottom of her face, close enough that she could feel his breathing against her neck. His silver hair draped around her head, blocking any view outside his beautiful facial features. His free hand wandered gingerly towards her almost-bare chest, softly dragging one, long claw across her soft skin, from her collar bone, down to the base of her stomach, leaving her with a feeling of warmth between her legs and a reddening face; all while he kept his fiery gaze locked onto her deep red eyes, watching her every reaction. But she didn't struggle - she feigned a calm facade, though her hot face, reddened ears, and pounding chest told a whole different tale. She felt her skin tingle under his uncharacteristic ministrations; she didn't peg him to be the gentle, seductive kind when picturing this elusive scenario.

Unsatisfied by her lack of adequate response, he upped his game one more notch, leaning even closer, letting his cold lips touch the base of her neck, blowing warm breaths on her quivering body as his palm pressed firmly between her breasts.

She gasped audibly, jolting in surprise at the sudden contact of his soft lips against her wet skin, her eyes widening as she tugged against firm grasps subconsciously, the look in his eyes bringing about a feeling throbbing in her lower stomach she didn't quite know how to react to.

That was all the reaction he needed. He pulled back casually, leaving her laying down on the ground with a mix of mild shock and disappointment written all over her face. Raising a clawed hand, he swept a mass of his silver hair off his face, sitting back down against the same spot in the tree he originally was. For a second, they made eye contact, and in that moment, the wind demon could have sworn she had seen a small, smug smirk on his lips and a look of victory in his eyes, right before that stoic facade took over and he closed thin lids over those golden hues in a pretense of a small nap.

"If you were going to dry your clothes, you best hurry up. We leave at sundown."

She sat up from the grass, grasping at the seams of her _kosode_ , shutting them closed. Her face was red, but whether it was from the anger, the feeling of shattered pride, or the sense of sexual unfulfillment, she couldn't quite tell. Not that it mattered. The prissy _daiyoukai_ certainly knew he won that round and had gained an advantage.

"I was already planning on it."

Pulling her fan from the pile of clothes that lay dropped by his feet, Kagura called a gust of wind around her, drying her hair in cold breeze and blowing the remnants of earth and grass off her now-drying attire.

In that moment of Sesshomaru's amusement, he found her company well more than gratifying. It had been long since he found entertainment in such kind of matter, let alone from the presence of a woman. Whatever worried and plagued him effectively cleared from his head _temporarily_ as he could only remember the sensual touch of her slightly arched body towards his fingertips, as if subtly begging him for more, all while her face held that bogus apathetic expression in an effort to deny his obvious upper hand. He undeniably liked this game that she had started, and for the first time, he looked forward to his nomadic days with a new consort. In the quiet part of his mind, an image of Rin flashed in his memories - her flower crowns and cheery laugh reminding him he had to come and see her soon and for a moment, he wondered how she would feel about traveling with Kagura instead of Jaken, but alas, he pushed the thought aside. The libido of his momentary encounter with the red-eyed demon had yet to settle down, and his mind in that flash, was wrapped only in the _youkai_ before him.

She regarded his sham of a nap with mild annoyance, her wounded ego getting the best of her. Somewhere inside, she cursed her own unpreparedness. She should have anticipated it, but how could she? She didn't know much of his personality outside his cold demeanor and the ruthless conqueror he was known to be. It was hard to read him, and she wondered if anyone had ever really read him or if they just projected their thoughts on the blank canvass he provided.

 _No matter._

With a slight hint of a sly smile in the corner of her arched lips, she made it a goal to make sure she learned his every little quirk. To know him better than anyone else.

 _Next round_ , she though, _I'll definitely get you back_. The game, after all, had only just began.


	4. Chapter 3: Addictions and Resolves

An hour ago the sunset had radiated across the cloud, turning it molten orange with bands of pink. Now its gone and she sat under the starless, moonless sky. There was no twilight, only blackness. Another cloudy night rolled in covering the last of the night sky, as if the blackness failed to come by fast enough. The rolling gray rapidly became as invisible as the stars it concealed, but the air still felt humid. The darkness was thick and the fire that burned the neat pile of wood she had gathered hardly lit their camp, allowing her to see at most a few feet around the barren part woods they had chosen to stay the night.

They had just come from the human village to visit his human ward earlier; their interaction, in her opinion, just as awkward as it's always been, if not worse. He was always prissy, but around the human girl, he was uncharacteristically _puritanical_. They had an air of comfort between them, true, but there was also an invisible wall, _a barrier_ , that neither of them seem able nor even particularly interested to breach. Their meetings were far too formal, too uptight, like both of them were trying to hold too much of themselves back in fear of judgement from the other.

 _How strange._

And to think they both thought it would be a good idea to travel again together. _Ha_. She could already picture one of the demon lord's bouts of murder scaring little Rin, followed by some moralistic speech of why killing is bad and that there would have been better ways to deal with conflict than carnage. Humans are so easily predictable, after all. Especially one as sheltered as his human ward. She didn't understand the world of demon politics; it's as complicated as it was brutal and someone raised in the comforts of a peaceful town will never understand the fragile balance of how their hierarchy is maintained.

Of course, she had nothing _personal_ against the human child; in fact, they were friends, albeit not close ones. She had a reclusive behavior back during the time she lived in the village to recuperate after regaining back her heart and she never quite bonded close to anyone, though Rin was a great help in getting her back on her feet. Occasionally, they would talk, but there wasn't much they had in common to hold conversations for very long. She did, however, loved listening to her stories about her Lord Sesshomaru. It was amusing, hearing the great demon lord in a painted perspective of an innocent child as she saw him so much different from the way the rest of the world did, her rose-colored glasses seeing him in a light where he was some sort of silent hero and savior of the weak. _In a sense_ , she supposed, _she wasn't entirely wrong_ , which only made it all the more interesting. It seemed though, that despite the unrequited attachment, the little girl latched onto her in the little time she spent in their village, and in later days, she found out it was because the child had a hard preference in being with demons, given her tragic history with humanity.

All things considered, she _liked_ Rin. And while her company would provide some level of enjoyment given her happy-go-lucky personality so contrast to that of her practically-mute lord (some travel conversations would be nice, she gathered), she wasn't particularly excited on what it entails regarding the little _game_ she and the silver-haired demon had started not too long ago. With the way he acts around his human ward, it was realistic to assume their _private pastime_ would come to permanent stop - and of course, she didn't want that. It was a side of him she doubt many had every seen - and will _ever_ see - and in a selfish, demanding note, she wanted to keep it all to herself. He was like a drug, a growing addiction - and while she liked to deny anything _emotional_ about it, deep inside, she knew something was brewing deep within. In very few times they've engaged in this... _exchange_ , they've never gone further than silent, sensual touches, gingerly exploring each other's upper bodies with half-naked torsos. They went on _painfully_ slow, so much that they never even kissed. Kissing was far too personal, too _passionate_ for an act that was only meant to toy cruelly with the other, waiting to see who breaks first, and kissing would mean defeat, in more ways than one. They simply raised the bar, one notch at a time, adding little by little to each stage they stepped on to, but with the rarity of these _rounds_ , it felt to her that they were on that fondling stage for far too long. But perhaps, that was _exactly_ what he wanted her to feel, and she just couldn't afford to lose: not to that smug look on his face and that small smirk on the corner of his lips as he pulled back each and every single time, leaving her with a sense of growing frustration.

Her companion sat across from her, leaning up against a cold, stone boulder that protruded idly from the dry earth. He didn't seem tired nor in need of rest, but he called for one anyway; and whether it was out of habit still or concern for her well-being, she doubt she'd ever know. His eyes were closed, but she knew he wasn't asleep - the pace of his breathing was too brisk and she could sense the tension from his body as he listened into the deathly silence disturbed only by the crackling fire and the blowing breeze, scanning for potential signs of danger.

 _Was he the same way when traveled with the child and imp?_ , she wondered.

Other than the darkness and her gold-eyed company, all that seemed to exist was the chilly wind with its harsh bite could be felt through her thick layer of clothes. It was unnaturally cold for a summer night, she could feel the hairs on her arm raised and the bite of the wind had left its mark in the form of small bumps that were tingling on her skin, but its bite was more than flesh deep. Her blood ran cold through her veins and her bones were left chilled. The flames of from their campfire may have looked as though they burned warm, but their heat didn't seem to reach her body, no matter how closely she she sat by it.

 _How ironic_ , she thought, _being made this uncomfortable by the very element of my existence_.

An unconscious sigh escaped her dark painted lips; the puff of her warm breath visibly contrast against the bleak temperatures. He seemed to have noticed.

"Kagura."

She looked up from what she decided was a pathetic excuse of a fire, turning to see his deadpan expression, his eyes still closed. He was beautiful, and even more so in the dark night as his silver hair seemed to reflect what little light there was and his primarily white clothing seemed bright in contrast to the dark background.

"What?"

His shoulders stiffened lightly, but not enough for her to notice.

 _Not the response he was expecting._

She was cold, and calling her name was meant to be a gentle hint to tell her to sit next to him as his _moko-moko_ would have given her the warmth her body seem to desperately crave. But alas, she wasn't like Rin (both fortunately and unfortunately), he realized, and his subtlety was lost on her. She just stared at him with a confused expression, waiting for him to say something as the seconds passed with only deafening silence between them.

"You may sit next to me, if you're cold."

 _'May'? You pompous little..._

She scoffed, dragging her knees to her chest as she balled herself up closer to the fire, wrapping her arms around her knees. She hated his high and mighty way of talking. She hated the way he 'gave permission' for people to come close to him, like the whole world was beneath him. Even when _he_ was the one asking a favor, he always spoke like he was just granting someone else permission to _serve_ him. It annoyed her to no end, and this time was no different. Not that it was meant to be a command particularly, she _was_ cold after all, but the wind sorceress freezing in the cold gust of air that blew through the frosty night was an irony that her pride just couldn't take. She gritted her teeth in mild annoyance, bringing her gaze back to the burning flames that mocked her chilling bones.

"I'm doing just fine by myself, thanks. Unless of course, you're just really indirectly begging for my close company."

His eyes opened, staring straight at her very own. Even from afar, she could see the flicker of exasperation in his frigid glare. Her comment seemingly struck something deep and the fact that it showed even slightly in his impassive demeanor meant she _really_ struck a nerve. And far from how other demons would have reacted in that realization, she smiled - that devious grin on her face riling him up even worse.

He's always had torn feelings towards her casual impudence: between hating her rude audacity to question his leadership and _purposely_ attempting to mock and challenge him every chance she gets, and being _drawn_ to the way she treated him like a _normal_ being - without reverence to his rank as a lord or fear of his power in wrath and anger - he wasn't sure which side to favor more. He hated the way she tried to rile him up on purpose; saying things for the intention of finding out exactly what ticked him, as if experimenting on the subject of his emotions was a job she was hired to do, but he liked the way she didn't seem to fear the repercussions. He could have snapped and just killed her like he did everyone else who so much as stood in his way, but for some reason, she seemed at ease despite the brutality of what he _could_ do, as if she knew for fact he _wouldn't_ do anything. She trusted him, albeit differently from the way Rin did but still in a similar sense. Rin had viewed him to be some sort of rightful protector - and that all his past ruthless sadism was all called for even when it wasn't, and therefore she saw him in some sickly pure light that had somehow made him _want_ to be the man she thought he was. He cared for her so much that he was willing to _change_ without even realizing it, so she would never have to see the stains of blood on his sleeves and smell the scent of death on his sword. But Kagura? She stuck with him despite the massacres, even after seeing the havoc in his wake as he painted the scenery red in the blood of those who opposed him. The bloodlust in his eyes never phased her and she understood the darkness that was the venom on his lips that he kept trying to wipe away.

Another gust of cold wind blew and the shiver of her spine was too painfully obvious for the demon lord to ignore. The last spurt caught a feather on her hair, pulling it off her black locks, blown harshly to his direction. In one swift motion, he caught it gently in hand, raising his open palm as a wordless invitation for her stand up and take it back.

"Tsk."

Pushing herself off the ground with the back of her palms firmly pressed against the soil, she stood up, walking briskly to his direction to retrieve her feathered pin. But as soon as her fingers grazed his raised hand, his other one grabbed her wrist, pulling her down on the ground in front of him, his signature calm expression unbreaking.

"What the-"

She didn't get to finish her train of thought as she swallowed the rest of the sentence that was stuck on her throat, condemning her to a momentary silence. How could she _not_? In a flash, his lips were pressed hard against her own, the pressure of his jaw pushing her head backwards, held only by his hand that had somehow snaked behind her head without her noticing. Without even so much as a pause, he pulled back just enough to bite her lower lip, sending her to a sensual taste of intoxication she had never reached before. Inattentively, her hand ran across his back, fingers gripping at a mass of smooth silver hair that ran through the spaces between her fingers like a heavy cascade of the finest silk threads.

The feeling of her fingers pulling on his hair only added to the passion of his forceful first kiss. It wasn't originally his intention to cave in first, but he couldn't resist that arrogant look on her face much longer; he, too, thought the _sly games_ had gone on long enough. She needed to learn her place and he wanted to teach her. He wanted to show her his power, he wanted to _control_ her - to punish her for the starting a fire in his heart that wasn't there before. A fire he couldn't control - and he was _always_ in control. It burned deep within, driving him to a thirst only few could quench. In a short time, she got him tied up around her fingers, eliciting a feeling of powerlessness from him. And he _hated_ it. He hated that he couldn't calm his pounding heart when she purposely stood too close when she talked, he hated the way his knuckles turned ash white from his tightly clenched fists as she bathed in his audience, he hated the way she touched him so casually when no one else every did - her light tapping on his back when she felt his mild traces of stress, the way she poked his arm for attention if she needed to show him something, the way walked just a little too close some days, her hips brushing up against his thighs, bringing about some primal desire that made him wonder what about her drove him to such insanity that other, more beautiful demons that he had been with before didn't have. Slowly, he dragged his lips down from her bottom lip to the base of her neck, his raspy breathing against her skin turning her body hot.

Her resistance crumbled - not that she had much of any, to begin with. She had always welcomed, even instigated, his rough ministrations but this time is different. She hadn't done anything to warrant this reaction. It was all him; whatever was built in from the previous, unfufilling times before had snapped something, letting out a ravaging beast thirsty for flesh. A hand runs through his hair, as the kisses become harder, urgent. Another hand slides around her waist, and pulling her close to his pine scented body. His kisses moved down to her shoulders, parting the layers of her _kimono_ aside leaving her bare skin out in the open. With all her willpower, Kagura tried to remain indifferent.

 _It doesn't do to let someone with an ego like his know how much power he has._

She didn't lean in, didn't make it easy or seem too keen, but as he dragged his hand from her waist to her thigh, slipping his warm hands up inside her skirt - her skin burning at his touch - she caved.

Another, stronger gust of wind blew, killing the bonfire by their side, submerging them into complete darkness. As it turns out, that was exactly just was he was waiting for.

As the cover of the cloudy evening masked the expression on his face, all pretenses fell. His calm and stoic facade faded into lust and desperation, but it didn't matter. In the cover of darkness no one can see his raging look in his eyes, the lost of control on his face. His fingers worked fast and quick. His motions felt fluid as he skillfully undid her obi, bringing his lips back to hers as he did so. the top layer of her _kimono_ fell off her shoulders, leaving behind nothing but a loose _kosode_. His _moko-moko_ dropped to the ground as her fingers meddled with the locks on his armor, trying to match his pace, but alas, his years of first-hand experience had given him quite the leverage. Her breathing hastens, the intense rhythm of her heartbeat undergoes an irregular count, hammering quicker than a lightning bolt as his hand slithered around her body, searching smoothly for the seam of her dress. He found it with ease.

As the night went on, their soon-naked bodies merged together in synchrony, her loud moans and gasps that was tied to his every thrust filled the silence for what seemed like hours. His occasional groan echoed with the sound of her wordless yelps in torturous stalling for her release.

And almost as unexpectedly as it started, it was over.

She woke up to sound of birds loudly singing over her head. Sunlight filled the sky, pure scattered light; its hue ambitiously illuminating each crevice of the land. Sparrows chirped an explicit background melody. Her kimono was draped over her shoulders like a make-shift blanket, tucked neatly under her skin. It's hard to imagine the silver-haired demon lord to be so courteous, but seeing as the previous night was far beyond the scopes of his usual, she simply accepted it with small smile drawn on her small lips. He _did_ keep his original intentions though. She was more than warm for the rest of the evening.

She sat up, looking around for any signs of the _daiyoukai_ but she couldn't sense him nearby.

 _Strange_ , she thought.

 _Did he suddenly have bouts of regret and ran off?_

Then it hit her.

 _Rin_.

They were supposed to pick her up from the human village later that day, but he had went on without her, letting her sleep in.

Slowly, she had began putting her clothes back on and fixing her tangled mess of a hair. She could still smell his lingering scent on her clothes and her skin bore red bite marks and purple hickeys evident of their steamy night. The memory of his bare chest was fresh on her mind, his silver hair illuminating the scarce moonlight as it appeared in seconds at a time when the heavy cloud cover decided to part just slightly to shine little light over the pitch black world beneath it. The scent of his minty breath still stuck to her skin and the salty taste of his sweat loitered on her lips. It was an addicting experience, and she wondered if anyone else had experienced this same bliss under his passionate embrace. Who even thought he knew what _lust_ was? Sesshomaru and libido didn't look like they belonged in the same page, let alone the same sentence.

The sound of a human carriage rolling over a paved path close by brought her thoughts back to reminder of the real possibility that she could lose it all over the appearance of another girl in their little duo, and the thought irked her.

There was _no way_ she's letting a little human girl take it all away from her. Not in a million lifetimes.


	5. Chapter 4: Realizations

They haven't walked for very long before they were rejoined by a waiting Kagura, sitting on an old tree stump they were about to pass. She looked just like she did yesterday, outside a slightly messier bun than usual, the pins looking like they might have been slightly crooked, but she couldn't tell for certain on her current angle.

"You should have told me you were leaving instead of leaving me behind. How cruel."

The silver-haired _daiyoukai_ made no response. He simply walked idly, seemingly ignoring the wind sorceress' complaints.

Rin had wrapped herself in a long silky cloak that gleamed in the starlight, a gift from her lord a few months back, watching the one-sided bicker occur. Her long, black hair draped over her shoulders, reflecting a fractions of the moonlight through its silky strands. The view brought by a nostalgia from years past, when Jaken was where Kagura is now. She whined a lot less and talked even lesser so compared to the green imp, but she was better company - with wittier responses and far less pretenses. She was smarter, classier - and being a woman just like her, Rin was way more comfortable being open around the wind _youkai_ than she did with her replacement. A small innocent smile painted itself on her round, pink lips.

She missed this; the chilly breeze on her face as they walked under the starry night sky, the sore feeling on her legs as they walked further each day to some place new, the solemn silence of her lord as he led them forward every single day.

"Where are we headed, Lord Sesshomaru?"

He slowed his pace slightly, as if her question had dragged him back to the present. For a moment, he seemed distracted, and the young healer could have sworn she saw those golden eyes lingered a little too long on the wind sorceress' face at the corner of his sights but the stern tone in his voice pulled her back to her own question, dropping the subtle observation somewhere at the back of her mind.

"The West. We will be meeting with Ah-Uhn."

"Will we be passing the Western Castle, my lord?"

He eyed her on a curious note, the tone in her inquiry made clear she seemed to be expecting a _literal_ castle. And she was.

"Yes."

You could almost see her eyes glimmer brightly in wide eyed expectation. She had heard so much stories about it from Jaken all the way from back when she was still a child; from the massive gardens filled with rare flowers, the magnificent halls adorned by only the finest and rarest items, the collection of art that belongs of the lady of the house, the magical rooms that rested legends, to the hundreds of servants needed to maintain a glorious estate. She could imagine it all now: great, majestic stone walls covered in crawling wildflowers with a massive gate guarded by huge demons that protected the castle, giant towers protruding from the sides of the great palace with huge windows and hidden rooms within the walls, gardens that doubled as a massive labyrinth of green hedges and-

"Don't raise your hopes too high, it's not actually a _real_ castle."

She could hear the suppressed chuckle in the _youkai's_ voice as those deep red eyes regarded her with a look of entertainment. Kagura pressed a hand over her dark, painted lips in a halfhearted effort to repress the grin that had slyly crept over her face.

"..Eh?"

"It's not an actual castle. No giant stone palace with towers and massive gates secluded somewhere in the middle of the woods, if that's what you're imagining."

"But Master Jaken-"

"-was obviously exaggerating, like he does for everything else."

"Oh."

The sparkle in her eyes faded with disappointment, her lips pressed tight and her chin dipped towards her chest. For a moment, the silver-haired demon who watched the two women's exchange regarded her with worry. The topic of reconstructing the estate had came up before but he gave it no real interest and shoved the idea off to the side, and somehow, right then, he cursed himself for not having rebuilt it as an _actual_ castle when he had a chance. His chest tightened just watching the sullen look on her face over something seemingly so trivial to him.

 _Perhaps matter like such meant more to humans than it did to demons?_ , he wondered.

Despite the obvious hilarity of the human girl's unrealistic expectations about the demon lord's home, Kagura too had caught Rin's not-so-subtle disenchantment, as if someone had just crushed the dreams she's had for years in a single comment. The quiet scowl on the demon lord's face only made the assumption even clearer. _Oops_.

A soft sigh escaped the _youkai's_ lips as she raised a hand to the healer's shoulder, patting her lightly; her weak substitute for a hug. Dark brown eyes looked down at her deep red ones, and she forced a halfhearted smile at the corner of straight-lined lips.

"It's more of a _siheyuan_ , really. Think of it like a rich war lord's estate", she paused for a second, gathering her thoughts on how to better describe the Lord of the West's childhood dwelling. She had only been there several times before, and though she had explored some areas of the massive courtyard house, it was far too big and too spacious to tour in only a few hours at a time. "Only the main house has a double floor, so the whole area is low to the ground. No tall towers for sure, but what it lacks in height, it definitely makes up in space. The centerpiece of the manor is a huge pond surrounded by hedges of rare herbs and flowers, and though it's overgrown with weeds last I saw it, I imagine it'll still be pretty scenic during Spring..."

The twinkle in the taller human girl's eyes reignited as she latched herself onto the female _youkai's_ descriptions, creating a new vision on her mind as her new companion filled in the details.

"...The rooms are generally massive, meant to house the _inu daiyoukai_ it was built for even in their full demon forms, so the ceilings are raised high. The sleeping quarters are connected to the main court through stilted outdoor hallways, and the estate expands for way over a mile in diameter. Obviously, a property this big requires hundreds of servants, but since the previous lord died and the _new_ one here had little to no interests in maintaining the residence and distrusts most of _everyone_ , it's severely understaffed and most of the unused areas are being reclaimed by the earth. In my opinion, only the main hall and the central quarters are still well kept, but I doubt they're even close to their former glory - not that I'd ever know for sure considering I wasn't alive yet during the reign of the _Inu no Taishou_."

 _Wow_. It was was even better than what she had originally imagined it to be. A home so entwined with the earth sounded more befitting to someone like the silver-haired _daiyoukai_ than a tall, cold palace made of stone.

"You sound like you've really explored the whole place. Was it beautiful?"

 _Beautiful?_ When the wind demon first explored the area, ' _beautiful_ ' wasn't what came to her mind. It was desolate, grim, and dying. The paint on the walls had long started fading and the smell of mold was apparent even in the chambers farthest from decay. There was hardly anyone in sight; the very few servants that still worked for the estate were thinly dispersed over the spacious grounds - the rest of the household attendants had long switched over to serve the Lady of the West in a different, personal manor in a far off area. The ceilings creaked and moaned under strong gusts of wind and rain water dripped and leaked on the soaked carpets that lined the inside of the dusty guest room that she had stayed in. The trees that framed the clearing in which the manor was built had long gone untrimmed; their overgrown branches and thick leaves blocked the sun even on the finest days, leaving a musky odor of stagnant mud and decomposition in areas less visited. The rare collectibles and rich items that decorated the halls now lay encased in an inch of dust and cobwebs, leaving her with a shiver on her spine at the mere reminder of a spider.

But Rin didn't want to hear that, and she's already crushed one too many dreams tonight - the last thing she needs is to drop another shattering revelation and have the prissy _daiyoukai_ pissed in the process - not that she was scared to anger him, of course, but he's always given off a vibe that his human ward was the one thing about him that was off limits, and messing with her would likely be something even the _fuujin*_ cannot get away with.

"If you're into that, I suppose. Wasn't much my style."

Rin grinned in response, turning her attention back to the demon lord that had just picked their camp for the night. The chilly wind had started to blow similarly to the night before, but luckily not as harsh. The bite of the cold breeze was more forgiving and the dark sky was mostly clear, letting most of the bright moonlight through to illuminate the small glade in which they were to settle for the evening. Dropping her small sack bag on the ground, she proceeded to scrounge for dry wood for fire, squinting her eyes in a vain effort to see better but to no avail. It took sometime, longer than she intended, but she gathered enough for a small bonfire. The wind sorceress had picked a spot farther back across her lord, sitting lazily against the a huge rock she pushed up as a make-shift seat with eyes closed and her arms folded across her chest. She seemed fast asleep. The demon lord, on one hand, kept to his classic spot of sitting with his back idly against the bark of a tree, though unlike the female _youkai_ , he was wide awake, watching as she pulled out a box of matches from her pocket. With a gentle grip, he watched intently and curiously as she held the minuscule stick by it's midpoint between her thumb and her index, holding the box out with her other hand. Swiftly, she dragged the match down against the striker one, two, three times and just like magic, a small fire lit the head of the wood and fascination wrote itself in his usually impassive expression.

He needn't say anything; she caught the faint change in his expression as always and she understood exactly what he wanted to know. She lighted the dried leaves to start the fire before tossing the half-burned matchstick into the now-growing flames.

"It's called a 'match', my lord. Lady Kagome had brought it with her from her era on her last visit", she stood up, holding the box of match in her hand as she walked over to where he sat, gingerly sitting right next to him. She was careful to put space in between them, as if some sort of invisible _barrier_ kept her from getting any closer, making sure his personal space was well respected - something Kagura, he noted, did the exact opposite of. She was fine and proper, her posture alone evident of her good manners and proper upbringing; the old priestess Kaede had taught her well.

Raising the small cardboard box up on her hand for him to see, she tilted it to the side slightly, pointing at an even smaller, red strip that was plastered on its edge.

"This is the striker. The tip of the match is coated with dried chemicals that ignite with friction. So when it gets dragged across a rough surface like the sticker, it lights up and creates fire. It's a lot a like magic, except anyone can do it."

He nodded in understanding, the aloof expression back on his face though his eyes still gleamed with interest. She opened the palm of her hand in lieu of handing him the matchbox, an offer he took without hesitation.

Taking out a single stick, he stared at in observation for a few seconds before mimicking his ward's previous actions, keeping the information she had just disclosed in mind. In a small, rapid motion, he dragged the head across the red strip striker, setting the tip of the match on fire. Satisfied, he handed the box back to Rin, watching the small fire in his hand curiously for a little while longer before tossing it into the burning campfire, his curiosity satiated. She smiled sweetly in return, amused by the demon lord's childlike curiosity.

As the twilight grew deeper, the temperatures began to drop slowly, leaving the wind with a mild chill in their wake. The fire faltered and swayed, threatening to die out under the occasional gusts and blows but alas, it didn't. The healer raised her hand over the crackling flames, the heat barely warming her body. She silently cursed herself for not thinking to pack something warmer; years of idle waiting had made her forget the essentials of living in the woodlands.

Another cold breeze blew, sending a shiver up her spine and a tingling on skin, the lick of air chilling her to the bone. She looked up his right shoulder daintily, her mind exploring the imaging on just how warm is _moko-moko_ might have been on frigid nights like this.

Of course, the observant _daiyoukai_ noticed.

"Rin."

She turned her gaze towards his gold-colored eyes, the reflection of red from the embers highlighted the honey framed his heterochromic irises. Their gazes met, and after a moment, he closed his eyes in the pretense of an interest in resting.

"You may sit next to me, if you so wish."

The sparkle on her eyes only shone brighter.

"Thank you, my lord!"

She pushed herself up from the dusty floor. taking small, swift strides to his direction. Gleefully, she took his generous offer, placing herself on his right side, the warmth of his fur seemingly radiating from his body. She had intended to keep the few inches of space in between them - the thought of invading his sacred space was just something she just couldn't imagine doing anymore - but the chattering of her teeth made the resolve a little too difficult to uphold. She had done it often as a child, but Jaken's dismay after he found out had taught her to distance herself a little further back, to respect that little barrier between him and everyone else in fear of invading his personal space and making him uncomfortable. The imp had made it clear her lord had only let it slide because she was a child who didn't know any better, and perhaps, he was right.

Another gust of cold breeze blew across her face, her hair mingling closely with his silver strands. The woods were filled with an ominous brittle silence as the wind penetrated the polyester fibres of her kimono with absurd ease. Cold licked at her face and crept under her clothes, spreading across her skin like the lacy tide on a frigid winter beach. With slightly parted lips and gently chattering teeth, she wrapped her thin cloak around her tighter as she closed her eyes to try and sleep the night away but to no avail.

His warm hands on her shoulder jolted her wide awake. Hesitantly, he pulled her close, pulling her willowy body against the warmth of his _moko-moko_ that lay just slightly in between them. He didn't look at her as he did so; he simply kept his gaze straight forward almost as if he was purposely avoiding eye contact as unlikely as it seemed. This close to him, she could feel the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed and the pounding of his heartbeat. His subtle invitation wasn't lost on her: gingerly, she scooted closer, her own heart racing as the adrenaline of the moment gave her the courage to lay her head against his chest, feeling the warmth that emitted from his body. His shoulders were rigid and his posture was stiff. She could feel the rasping minty breathes from his lungs as he inhaled and exhaled unnaturally deep. Then tension was apparent, but she was no better. Her heart pounded hard that she could almost feel it in her ears and there was a knot in her stomach she could hardly ignore. Minutes passed and yet neither of them had barely relaxed, their seemingly forced enfold felt as unnatural as it was surreal. Finally, she looked up, her dark brown eyes met directly by his austere stare, and for an instant, she had almost backed off thinking she had taken far too much liberty with his generosity, but his arm around her had kept her still. The solemn silence between their wordless exchange calmed her nervousness and just for a moment, she found herself able to articulate something she had been long waiting to say.

"I missed you, Lord Sesshomaru..."

He simply regarded her in thoughtful silence making no response, but she knew he heard her. He always did.

"Sleep. We leave at sunrise."

She nodded slightly in response, closing her eyes as she huddled closely to his chest, savoring the warmth of the dreamy moment that she had only long visualized in her fantasies. A yawn escaped her lips as the wind swooped up, over the heights, rushed and rustled through the tough mountain grasses, and gradually ebbed away through the crags to silence.

As her breathing slowed and her tense posture relaxed into deep slumber, he raised his left clawed hand to her face, parting away the long black locks that had strayed over her closed eyes. He peaceful sleeping face reminded him of times long gone, and in a low, deep voice, he gave her his answer.

"I've missed you too, Rin."

In the corner of a protruding boulder, lay the female _fuujin_ in her feign state of relaxation. She heard everything, saw everything. And while the cold winds chilled her body the same way it did the human girl, Sesshomaru didn't notice. His eyes only focused on _Rin_ , and in that moment, Rin _alone_. She felt like the third wheel, the crowd to the trio she only earlier thought she was favored member of. Her knuckles were ash white from her clenched fists so tightly gripped onto themselves that her palms were sore and burned as her nails dug deep and hard against her own skin. The heartbreak felt cold and heavy, like concrete drying in her chest. Their solemn exchange and the heartfelt emotions that lingered on their lips undeniably broke her heart and she could almost hear it shatter like glass in her ears.

He _loved_ Rin. And she loved him back.

The realization hit her like bucket of cold water to her face as the gentle breeze's brisk bite clung onto her tingling skin, but she no longer noticed. There was no pain or discomfort worse than the one that made her regret ever wanting her heart back.

 _In the end_ , it turns out, _she loved him too._

* * *

A/N: *Fuujin = wind demon/Japanese wind deity. I'm running out of synonyms and repetition is killing me, so I'm gonna start using more Japanese terminology just for something different.

Additionally, there will be some delays on the next chapter (sorry guys!) since it's been a little busy with work and I'm going out on a trip this weekend. Ideally, it should be up by this Friday before I leave, but I can't make any promises. It's currently... about 1/3 of the way there. So I still got some more ways to go.


	6. Chapter 5: The Western Palace

The dappled shade of the woodland trees had seemed so inviting only moments earlier, but as they drew closer, the old yellow and brown leaves hustled in the breeze, as the sounds of dead, weak trees, creak at every push the wind gave. _Odd_. It's only the end of summer and yet the air is colder than it should be, leaving chills as it climbed through the opening of his sleeves down across spine. The singing of the birds had long ceased to a stop for reasons he can never explain.

Looming red gates of the once magnificent entryway stood before them, locked and bolted from the inside. Now faded and tarnished, the thick wood once bore the red-and-white cherry blossom crest of the _Inu Youkai's_ bloodlines signifying their noble birth. Carved into the thick blocks were intricate designs once filled in with pure gold, but the earth had long reclaimed it and human looters had certainly helped. At the sight of their approach, the heavy gates opened with a loud screech; the very bolts that held them shut was closed for far too long it had aged and molded stuck together, screaming at every little attempt to pry them apart.

A white haired demon with an even whiter _yukata_ greeted them at the door, her skin almost as pale as ice and her eyes as blue as the clear sky. For a second, he noticed the wind sorceress stiffen, staring wide-eyed at his long-time servant but she quickly relaxed the moment she spoke.

 _Kanna, huh?_

"Welcome back, my lord. Master Jaken announced your arrival today."

He gave her a small nod as she bowed low, waiting for him to fully pass on ahead before pulling her head back and facing his following companions with a soft, gentle smile on her face.

"Hello, my name is Yuuta and I will be serving you both in your stay. If there is anything at all that you need, do not hesitate to ask."

He watched the exchange from the corner of his eyes, pausing mid-step to let the ceremonious greeting take place. It had been long since he had brought with him any formal guests; Kagura's initial arrival was handled by Jaken and therefore no such formalities were conducted. It seems, though, that the _fuuji_ caught on to this change as well, as she turned to him with a questioning stare in those cold, blood red eyes.

"Thank you. We will be keeping you in mind if we come across anything we need."

He turned his gaze from Kagura towards Rin when she spoke, watching her poise and grace as she voiced her response with an air of nobility. He knew for fact that the old human priestess was of no royal blood and the girl's attitude could therefore not have been something learned from simply watching. She was _taught_ it purposely and for a reason he has yet to fully understand, though part of him feels as if Kaede had been grooming Rin like an aristocrat for the purpose of _marrying_ her to one. She didn't strike him as the materialistic kind but he never did understand anyone who _was_ and so he admitted to himself he could never really be for sure.

 _I knew I shouldn't have the trusted the old witch._

The theory seemed awfully likely and it would explain her more-than-usual formality, so unlike the child he remembered from years ago. Deep inside, he wondered if that would be a good or a bad thing.

The wind _youkai_ only scoffed, muttering under her breath.

"If I need anything, I'll get it. I'm fully capable of taking care of myself, thanks."

Yuuta blinked in mild confusion; both her and the silver-haired demon lord knew that the comment wasn't directed at her but for the human healer, but it was dropped so subtly any less attuned person could have missed it. Rin's shoulder stiffened but she said nothing, evident that she caught it too. With another gracious bow, Yuuta gathered her skirt and wordlessly excused herself, the cue for the _daiyoukai_ to keep on walking.

Massive was an understatement to describe the courtyard of his estate. It was once used by his father as a training facility; meant to accommodate his full-demonic transformation. It was one, gigantic, barren space that had been overgrown by weeds and thorn bushes over the last century. Towards the far end of both corners, one could see the court houses that framed the empty training yard, and up ahead lay the metal gates that led into the hedge maze of old herbs and rare flowers. They walked briskly; the demon lord observing the reactions of his new companions.

Rin gawked at the size of the place, her imaginations having failed to do it justice. The hard packed dirt beneath her feet were cracked and dry and the cold air that was odd for a summer morning draped over the manor. The place reeked of old age and wisdom and while Kagura hadn't exaggerated about her portrayal of its abandonment, she found fascination in it's crumbling walls and rusting gates. The chateau was hundreds of years old - perhaps even older - any man-made building would have long collapsed after such a great amount of time, and yet her lord's childhood home still stood hauntingly mesmerizing through the wilderness, standing tall even when the decay licked its feet and the earth attempted to reclaim what had once belonged to it. She could only wonder how majestic it might have been like when the young Sesshomaru ran across the court to his father's side, back in the days when the castle was at it's prime as one of the strongest demon strongholds that existed.

Kagura, on the other hand, watched indolently, her deep red eyes showing little to no interest in the same court she's seen numerous times before. Her stage of fascination had long passed since after the first few times she's seen it, and the _daiyoukai_ found himself wishing he had been there to see her initial reactions the first time - he had, after all, never seen the prideful woman show particular interest in anything material. _Did she have the same wide-eyed curiosity? Did she walk around gawking at every little structure, picturing the past long gone?_ He cursed himself at the realization that he would never know.

After a lengthy walk, they reached the end of the lot, the tall green grass of the hedges greeting them with the strong scent of wild roses. The maze was glorious in the summer sunshine despite the eerie lack of warmth under it's penetrating rays; only weeks ago a person could have stepped over the walls but now it towered over even the great dog demon. That area was maintained better than the court, the grass beneath their feet was freshly mowed and the wall of crawling vines were damp from having just been watered. Every hedge was a uniform green despite the variety of plants that composed them, cut with a square top and center pieced by a centuries-old pond that was home to the oldest, rarest type of _koi_ in the country. It was all beautiful in an unconventional way; the green sunlight through the thick leaves that blocked the sky from view, the crooked fences and rusty metal doorways, the lush greenery that creeped upon the thick walls of manor. Even the smell mild smell of stagnant mud and the tinge of decay had place in the natural scenery of it all, the very circle of life surrounding them so closely they could almost feel the earth breathe.

Jaken stumbled out the wide entrance, immediately planting his forehead on the dusty floor effectively dragging the demon lord out of his deep thoughts.

"Welcome back my lord!", seeing the slender figure behind him, the green imp added, "And you too, Rin!"

"It's good to see you, Master Jaken!"

"Indeed! You look well! You got taller than the last time I remember!"

It was a nostalgic sight, seeing them together in such a manner that it felt like it was only yesterday when they walked around the country with the imp on his right and the little human girl on the other, chasing power and adventures he would have never had found at home. Through the naked boughs, over the frigid grass, and ghostly echoes, he could almost hear the hopscotch rhymes she once played through the hard-packed dirt path long gone. He could picture every detail of it all, from the stones that tumbled in their chaotic way, always at the mercy of chance down to the way she could never pick up large pebbles without seemingly toppling over. The sound of their conversations and the way their voices rang together was like a time machine - granting Sesshomaru a fleeting visit back to their old camps when the fire still burned bright and she still slept by his feet.

"Jaken."

The imp visible tensed at the mention of his name.

"Yes my lord?"

"We will be staying the night. Have Ah-Uhn ready by sunrise."

"Yes, Lord Sesshomaru!"

With another forehead-to-the-ground bow, he made his exit, dragging the Staff of Two Heads on his right hand.

Gold eyes wandered to the red-eyed demon before he kept moving forward, leading his thrilled human ward and the edgy _fuuji_ through the labyrinth of hedges that led to the entrance of the main hall. She seemed more and more uncomfortable the longer the day went, her brooding mood apparent in the way she walked with her head bent through the pathways, averting her eyes to the floor, but yet seemingly not wanting to look distressed. Her aim felt as it was invisibility, to simply blend in the background. The way her shoulders stiffened at every social interaction told him the exchanges only fueled her annoyance and she was uncharacteristically quiet in the most ominous way - the only time he's heard her speak all morning, poison was practically dripping out of the corners of her mouth. His intuition guessed there might have been an argument between her and Rin, but he couldn't picture the human healer being anything but soft-spoken and surely, he'd have heard them quarrel if they actually did, seeing as neither of them ever left his earshot since Rin rejoined them the previous evening. But he didn't. And he admittedly knew so little of the workings of the female mind to even attempt at comprehending what the wind demon is even thinking.

The looming doors of the hall towered way above their heads, ajar just enough for their group to enter with ease. The manor was red brick and much, _much_ older than what visitors would have assumed. It was overly large and ostentatious to the point of intimidation yet it laid so perfectly into the earthly background it was fluidly camouflaged into the countryside. In reality, it was all a perfect depiction of the legend of the _daiyoukai's_ very own father, the great _Inu no Taishou -_ old and tattered, the windows broken and the bricks crumbling, but, despite it's faults and failings it was still a thing of beauty.

From the inside, it was nothing short of majestic despite the thick layer of undisturbed dust that adorned majority of the items that decorated the long corridor. The walls were plastered in an antique wallpaper found nowhere else in the world, with intricate designs and markings that told the stories of their family's lineage, from the very first of their line to ever achieve their legendary rank. The quality of it held up so greatly against the strides of time that the hundreds - maybe even thousands - of years old lining had no dirt and no flaking or dents despite the very little care it hard received in the last few decades. The wide stairs ahead were twisted in a perfect spiral, like a child's slinky toy pulled from each end. Each stair was a deep walnut and he silently watched as Rin ran past him in an excited hurry, running her hand against the the black iron rail, admiring its rough rustic charm as she gingerly placed a foot on it's very first step. There was no creak or sign of rot as they were as solid as the day they were first made. She was beyond mesmerized; he could see the way she held her breath as she looked up at the looming ceilings above her, trying to see every detail to the engravings that were carved in every inch of the elaborate roof.

Kagura stepped up beside him, arms crossed across her chest as was what seemed to be her new signature standing position. The look on her face was a blank and unreadable as the stoic mask he wears but he could see the glimmer of fire in her eyes as she watched their human companion breathe in the wonders of the rustic architecture - one she perceived to be so bleak and gloomy.

Sesshomaru had found a new habit in comparing the two women unconsciously: they were just so... _different_. In his simple-minded, classic male mindset, he had always thought all women are the same (albeit he really didn't know that many women to begin with) - simply materialistic who cared a little too much about their titles and appearance and the way the rest of the world saw them. Wooing one was easy if a man was beautiful, rich, and powerful and needless to say, his younger years were filled with new partners every other day in an effort to understand why his father had decided to settle with one when he could have had them all. He didn't particularly found enjoyment in bedding with so many demon women; he had no interest in them at all until they offered their bodies to him in a desperate attempt to catch his attention and he had simply obliged. He had known Kagura and Rin would be nowhere near alike but only after seeing them so close to one another did he realize just how _different_ they actually were.

Rin was like a bright light - the kind he _needed_ to pull him out of the shroud of darkness that long froze his heart. Her innocent smiles, her sweet laughter, and the little things that made her genuinely happy was something he never understood but deeply appreciated. She uncovered a side of him _he_ didn't even see and the way she looked at him like he was some sort of _hero_ in the story of her life made him _want_ to be the kind of person she believed him to be. Whether he was willing to admit it in his heart or not, the reality was that she changed him. And he needed it - he needed _her_. But there was more to her than just her pure soul and her utmost kindness; there lies a fierce spirit in her heart and an unrivaled sense of loyalty he once thought was exclusive to demon kind. She was fearless and she saw everything in the best possible perspective, her optimism something that inspired him more than he even realize. If he was the sky, then she was the sun - and he needed her to illuminate his life like the earth needed the bright rays of sunshine to _have_ life. She was the one thing he didn't know he craved until he found her - he was so desperately swimming in the dark watching his half-brother bask in the light of his own sun, the cold grip of jealousy freezing over his lonely heart. But she came and changed it all, planting seeds in his soul that are now growing to be a field of beautiful daisies, just like ones she used to tuck in his long, silver hair as a child.

But Kagura was different. She was dark and cold - deceptive and manipulative. Her sleeves are stained with the blood of murder and her soul was just as tainted as his. Even the smiles that lit up her features was the wrong sort; it was as if her heart ran on cold malice instead of any form of genuine affection. She challenged his every word and unlike everyone else in his court, she didn't respect his absolute authority. She spoke when she wanted and said exactly what she meant with no pretenses or worry and perhaps that was part of her unlikely charm. She didn't regard him with fear and she didn't care for his power and fancy title. She did what she wanted with the same freedom as the wind and part of him admired that. Though he _despised_ the way she scoffed at his orders and how she wasn't scared to criticize his actions, he _loved_ the way she treated him as an equal - unapologetic and honest - something no one else had the audacity to even dare think of. She was the kind of woman he would go war beside, and he was comfortable around her in ways different from everyone else; she was much like the moon - she was the person that knew all his darkest 3am secrets, the subtle light that illuminated the moments he wanted to keep hidden in the darkness. And just like the moon, part of her was always hidden away - and in those rare moments when he could see her in full view, the scars that carved her body and the imperfections that plagued her being, it was hard to look away for she was beautiful.

"Is she always this needlessly excited about _everything_? It's just an old staircase."

The half-whispered mutter under her breath broke him out of his deep thoughts, bringing him back to the reality that was unfolding before him.

There was a bite in her tone that was also present just moments before when they first entered the complex. _Perhaps the reminder of her sister Kanna was bringing out some inner turmoil?_ , he though.

He didn't get the chance to respond (not that he wanted to in the first place), as Yuuta came around the corner from a servant's corridor, bowing lightly in respect before calling over the two female guests.

"Lady Kagura, Lady Rin. Your quarters have been prepared. If you're ready, I shall escort you to your rooms."

The human healer almost immediately rushed to the _yuki onna's_ [*snow woman; demon that controls ice according to Japanese legends] side with a leap in her steps, her obvious excitement written all over her face. He made a mental note to offer her a tour of the place before they leave; perhaps she could even give him an insight as to how he should renovate the estate.

"Lady Kagura, will you be joining us?", Yuuta added as the youkai had showed no intent of moving from her standing position.

"I'll find it later myself. I have no intention in sitting in an empty room for the rest of the day."

With a small nod of understanding, the demon servant bowed, leading the delighted Rin up towards the picturesque stairway.

The hallway on the second floor was grand. The wallpapers were just like the ones below: hand-painted and high quality, each panel uniquely painted to draw upon the history of the manor's previous lords and their lifelong accomplishments. They walked in a slow pace, allowing the fascinated Rin to watch in amazement at all the antique arts the old place presented.

Alone with the human ward, Yuuta walked silently, observing the infamous girl in secrecy. She had heard much about her - from Master Jaken's ramblings to the murmurs around the estate. There weren't many servants left around but the soldiers were as plentiful as ever, perhaps even more so now than there were during the time of the previous lord and they brought about whispers about the silver-haired _daiyoukai's_ personal whereabouts. Rumor has it that he had shown quite a great deal of interest in a stunning human maiden from a village somewhere near the north and that many anticipates the new lord would follow the odd footsteps of his fallen father, pursuing a _ningen_ * [Japanese for "human"] as a mate. True, Rin _was_ alluring and beautiful and watching her sweet smiles and gentle disposition, she could understand the appeal the Lord of the West may see in her, but there were demons that were more beautiful and far more grand: _what was so special about this girl?_

"Lady Rin?"

"Yes?"

Their pace slowed and the _yuki onna's_ bright blue eyes that shone almost white watched her companion's body language, her observant behavior reading Rin's every little move.

"May I take the liberty to ask a few questions? I'm curious about many things having heard so much about you."

"Of course! Ask ahead."

"Will you be staying at the Western estate as the new Lady of the West?"

The question had obviously caught the human healer off-guard. She was mortified, frozen to the spot. Her face was almost beet red and her face radiated heat like a hot pan.

"I-...No, Lord Sesshomaru and I-! ...I mean, our relationship is not like that-!", she faltered, tripping on her own word.

She regarded her curiously, the confused response only fueling her interest more.

"So you are _not_ his primary mate?"

"Well-no, it's-...we're not like that-"

"Are you going to be one of his mistresses then?"

"What-?! N-no! Of course not!"

At this point, they had stopped walking entirely, paused in the middle of a long corridor that ended right by the lord's own personal quarters. Rin's room, after all, was the one chosen closest to that of the prince's. _Predictable_.

"I see."

Yuuta stood quietly for a moment, adding up the new information she had just gathered. She rested her hand on her chin in contemplation, piecing out every detail to her theory. Sesshomaru had little to no interest in any women in all his years up until very recently, and even then, there were only ever two women they knew of outside his very own mother that he so much as acknowledged in more than just a matter of servitude. With little understanding of human sentimentality and their need for monogamy, she raised her eyes - looking straight at Rin's deep, brown ones - as she tactless asked, "If you're not the lord's chosen mate, I suppose that meant Lady Kagura would be the new Lady then?"

 _...Eh?_

Rin's flustered expression quickly died out, replaced by a look of utter confusion, a mix of mild anger and annoyance, and something else Yuuta couldn't quite place a finger on entirely. Her mouth hung slightly open and her eyes were wide open - her brain seemingly formulated no thoughts other than to register that she was shocked.

"What makes you assume that?"

As the sentence flew out of her mouth, she quickly wished she could take it back - somehow, she knew she was going to regret ever asking; there were some things she just wished she never knew.

"Because Lady Kagura and Lord Sesshomaru had shared a room here before. At first, I assumed she would have been just a mistress given the elevated status Master Jaken had painted you in, but considering your platonic relationship with the lord, his intimate relationships with the _fuuji_ must mean she would likely be his new mate."

Rin could feel her heart drop, the impact of it as it shattered on her feet felt like it had knocked every wisp of air from her lungs, and she stood there struggling to inhale, to exhale, to do anything. With watery eyes, she just stood there, dumbfounded, trying to remember how to breathe, unable to speak, totally stunned as his name bounced around inside her skull.

Her lord Sesshomaru, after all, _picked_ Kagura.

* * *

A/N: Sorry for the late update. Next updates will be a little behind schedule too (work stuff had just been busy and I'm behind some deadlines I need to work on early next week so next chapter wouldn't likely be out till mid-week, but I'll try and start it ASAP so I can have it up relatively timely. Thanks for all the support and the reviews so far!


	7. Chapter 6: Chances

_Hate_ was too strong of a word to describe the pounding on her chest every time she remembered their huddled bodies by the fire the night before, but it was close. The reality that the human girl outshone her in every possible way was a hard one to accept: five foot seven, willowy figure, well-defined curves in all the right places, smart and well-mannered, with a face cut right from the pages of a god's book of masterpieces. Kagura, on the other hand, had stopped growing at five foot three inches and she had the sort of plain, painfully _ordinary_ face people forgot even before they'd stopped looking at it. She wasn't ugly by any standard, but she didn't have that classic dark eyes and and even darker, silky long hair that everyone seemed to admire. She wasn't graceful or refined and she didn't have any trait in particular that made her stand out from the crowd; she was just, well, generic. _Average_.

She watched the _yuki onna_ disappear to the corridors on the second floor with Rin in tow, the heavy tension on the air felt like it had only gotten worse. Alone with the silver haired daiyoukai, she felt a clump on her throat form as she tried to desperately keep the impassive look on her face, hoping her forlorn eyes gave no hint on the turmoil that boiled in her blood.

 _Silence_.

They stood knee deep in eerie silence - the kind right before a massive storm. The air was so brittle it could snap, and if it doesn't, she thought she might. No one spoke, but there wasn't really much to say: the usual platitudes and sarcasms didn't feel all that appropriate at that very moment. Somewhere, she could hear the drops of dripping water as it hit a hard surface right below, each one reverberating around the room like a cymbal, yet no-one blinks or moves to even find it. Her mouth mouth was dry - like a sandbox in left under the heat of the summer sun.

Finally, she had enough.

"I'm going for a walk. This place is too dreary to hang around for too long."

She turned around in one fluid motion, her bare feet taking big strides against the cold, glossy matte tiles that span across the whole room. He didn't stop her; he could sense the tension as it crept up her spine and while he didn't exactly know why, he understood her near for fresh air. Gold eyes watched her in silence as she walked out into the courtyard outside through the ajar opening of the big metal doors that once sealed the entry towards the demon lord's estate.

Outside, the stiff feelings on her shoulders eased as she scanned the empty hedge garden with her deep, red eyes. She couldn't see a soul, but she could feel the presence of another demon nearby; someone she hasn't yet met (not that she met any one else before). She walked towards the maze they had just come from, with each stride her mind became more clear, more resolute, as if the growing physical distance between her and her two companions quelled the emotional chasm that raged within. As the nascent sunlight caressed her skin with a false promise of a new dawn, a new beginning, she tried to entomb her memories of him in thick walled ice. Ignorance _is_ a bliss, but she knew she no longer had that luxury. The emotional stares between the human girl and the demon lord were far too obvious and they scream far too loud for her to ignore.

She turned to the right, not even caring whether or not that would be the right way out as she could always just fly out anytime she wanted. There, at the end of the long trail, was a rusting metal table and two matching chairs sitting opposite from each other. She could hear the sound of shears as the sharp edges slid across the other half. With a few more curious steps forward, she could see a woman on the other side of the hedge, trimming the small, overgrown branches that reached towards the out-of-place centerpiece.

The stranger's was facing away from her and from her angle, she could only analyze so little of her unexpected company. Her black hair lies long and loose, the standard for most women in their era. It obscured the back of her red dress, yet allowed glimpses of her honeyed skin beneath. The strands flowed down her back, stopping in a line around her hips. As she leaned forward to reach for a stray leaf to her right, her hair moved with her, hiding her face until she straightened and flicked it back over her shoulders.

"It's quite an unexpected surprise to see you here, Lady Kagura. Is the lord not giving you a private tour of his estate today?"

Her voice was coarse like fragmented rock in hessian sack, moving and grinding against each other, so seemingly unnatural and mismatched against her fairly small physique and fluid, graceful motions.

"How do you know who I am?"

The woman turned to face her. She didn't seem overly old, but her body had aged passed her years so much so that she wore the wizened features of an old crone. As Kagura looked more intently, she could see the occasional strands of silver peeking through the ebony black mane that limply framed her aging face. She wore a plain, deep red yukata with a dark brown sash that reminded the wind demon of dried blood.

"Everyone in the manors know _of_ you, though I doubt many really knows _you_. It's not often the lord brings a woman home - in fact, you were the first in a _very_ long time. It's hard for whispers not to spread, in all honesty."

It made sense.

"So he _has_ brought others before?"

There was a hint of desperation in her voice as she took a hesitant step forward. Her heart throbbed wildly at the thought of what felt like the inevitable truth that she was just another one of many and idea shoved dread down her throat, momentarily giving her the feeling of drowning.

"Centuries ago, but yes, back when he was a wee lad, he did. Though it was less of him _bringing_ them and more of them showing up without invitation."

A smile painted itself on the older woman's face after noticing the almost immediate way her shoulders relaxed and her breathing paced slower.

 _In human years_ , Kagura thought, _she would have been around late 50's_.

"My name is Idari. But everyone just refers to me as _Hone Onna*_. I am the head of the servants in the Western Manor." [*literally "Bone Woman"]

She bowed just as formally as Yuuta had done just moments before, when they entered the palace grounds. The formality made her feel uncomfortable - it was just too _artificial_ and too preposterous for the lifestyle that the _kaze* youkai_ [wind] had been accustomed to living. Nonetheless, she said nothing; she just watched the ceremonial routine take place.

Sensing her mild tension, Idari approached her slowly, placing the sharp shears on top of the metal table not too far from where she stood. She pulled a chair back and sat down, motioning for the _fuuji_ to sit on the empty chair across from her. Kagura regarded her tentatively, but she walked forward and took the bone demon's offer.

"You seem unease. Did something happen between you and the Lord Sesshomaru?"

"Why would you assume it has anything to do with him?"

A small chuckle escaped Idari's lips, a gleam in her deep dark eyes gave away so much of her amusement.

"I've been alive long enough to recognize a woman's jealousy, child."

"I'm not a child and I'm certainly _not_ jealous."

"So the fact that lord favors the human child doesn't bother you at all?"

Kagura didn't respond. She just sat there, her back against the cold metal with an even colder expression drawn on her face. The reminder from the events of the previous night and the way they look at each other in the split second their eyes meet gave her the feeling of shards in her gut. Her hands unconsciously tightened into a fist gripped so strongly that her palms felt sore against the pressing of her sharp nail against her ivory skin. Though her face gave none of her turmoil away, the way her body tensed at the suggestion alone spoke volumes; and Idari caught it all.

With a small smile on her face, she leaned forward against the table, the rust staining the sleeves of her red dress, though barely even noticeable.

"I've lived here long before the prince was even born. I was one of the first to ever hold him as an infant and I made sure he had everything he needed when his mother had left and his father fought his battles. Lord Sesshomaru was always alone. He was feared so young - too young to realize why people feared him. His mother didn't abandon him, but demon aristocrats like her simply didn't express love the same way human mothers do and he grew up lonely, I suppose. He stopped playing almost as soon as he realized what games were. He lost the sparks of a child way before it had even started. He grew cold and calculating and for the longest time, he remained like that, only growing reckless and hot-headed over the years especially after his father had chosen a human woman before him. He disliked humans before but he grew to hate them as his father favored his human family so much that he's shown blatant care and favoritism in favor of his half-brother in levels he had never expressed with him. I'm sure the lord had loved them both, but the child of the woman he actually _loved_ definitely held a bigger part to his heart over the child he only bred to continue on his legacy. This place became his prison. A place he was meant to stay and watch as the world revolved around him and moved forward, leaving him behind. I suppose that's one reason why he's letting this place rot: whether he'd like to admit it or not, the empty halls of a childhood home where his family should have been but wasn't probably haunts the back of his mind still. I can't say I blame him."

She leaned back again, reaching her right hand inside the folds of the left side of her _yukata,_ pulling out an old wooden pipe that she she casually held on her thin, willowy fingers. Her dark, black eyes watched her now enticed companion; she could see interest spark those blood-red eyes. She could almost sense her anticipation in an almost nervous kind of energy. It tingled through her like electrical sparks on the way to the ground, gathering in her bare toes.

"So he's always been like this?"

"More or less. He's changed much in the last 10 years, even more so in the last few months. Though he's never the kind to chat, I could always tell. He's much calmer and far more collected now than he's ever been. I dare say he's matured into someone much like his father, probably a lot less emotional than the old dog ever was, but he's grown up to be a much better being now since after taking a few years out there just finding himself."

"It's likely because he met her."

"Or you. Though I suppose it's a little bit of both. Despite all these years with him, regrettably, I still can never quite read behind that apathetic mask of his - only his deceased father ever seemed able to. I do know he cares a lot of about the both of you - _that_ much is pretty obvious, and whether that care is platonic or _not_ \- it's something I'd also like to know."

"And why is that?"

Idari placed the pipe to her lips, her fingers lighting the end with little effort.

"Because I'm curious to know who would be the one person to thaw his frozen heart."

"You make it sound like such a big deal."

"But it is. It might sound like such a personal decision but he _is_ a lord. His life is politics and it's high time he produces his own heir. If he doesn't pick a mate on his own soon, he'll have one picked for him by his mother or his council. I'd like nothing more for him that having have chosen someone he actually cares for - the fate of following his father's footsteps is just far too tragic."

"The current Lady of the West was chosen by the council?"

"Of course. Why else did you think his father married her? They were hardly friends even _after_ Lord Sesshomaru was born. It was just one political decision and she happened to fit the bill quite perfectly."

"I see... And you think he'll pick Rin?"

"I don't know. He might. Or he might pick you."

"I'm not interested in playing house here."

"But you _are_ interested in him, no? In fact, I'm pretty well certain you already _love_ him."

Just as she spoke, she removed the pipe from her thin lips, blowing the smoke in the air carefully. Kagura didn't respond to her, but she didn't need to; she already knew her answer. She could see pained look in her eyes as she looked up her very own, screaming a heartbreak she doubt she'd ever vocalize.

"And he already _loves_ her."

Her voice was low and she talked as if saying it out loud would only made it real when she hoped it wouldn't be. Idari understood the pain; after all, she felt the same thing long ago, when _Inu no Taishou_ had gone off to wed another without ever even realizing she cared for him far more than just a childhood friend - something she always did regret.

"And why does that matter? That doesn't mean you can't fight for him."

 _Fight for him?_

"What do you mean?"

"I don't mean kill the human girl, if that's what you're wondering. Besides, I doubt that would do you much good."

 _Can I really fight for him?_

"Then what are you saying?"

"I'm saying if something's important to you, you don't just give up because the situation looks bleak."

 _But... can I even win?_

"It's not the same. It's not just something I can take."

"But it is. I've heard about your fight to regain your heart, Kagura. This isn't that much different. Now instead of yours, you'd just be fighting for his. True, it might not be something you can just _take_ , but it's something that can be easily earned. He sees you. He's looking at you. You just have to do _something_."

 _Do I even really have a chance?_

"Why are you helping me? What do you get out of this?"

The bone specter's lips curved into a small smile, her eyes showing a tinge of sorrow despite the grin on her face.

"The chance the lord won't have to live through the death of a wife who ages at the passing of time, turning back to earth before the lord even realizes it."

 _I do._

* * *

A/N: Sorry peeps. I've slowed down to a goal of two chapters a week; it's been hectic and will only continue to be for a while, with summer approaching. My schedule's pretty full outside some few hours here and there where I can squeeze in a chapter every couple days, so I sincerely apologize for the longer wait. I'm looking to hopefully set a firm schedule for updates by next week so watch out for that! Anyways, thanks for the reviews guys! Again, I definitely read all of your inputs and it's actually helping shape the story as it goes on (some common questions and assumptions I usually try and clear up on the next chapter after the feedbacks are posted), so keep it all up!

EDIT: I've been getting too much hostility on this so I figured it's time to make a response: to people "threatening" to stop reading because their favorite ship isn't in one chapter, go right on ahead. No reputable (aspiring) writer will change their vision over something someone else says :) Suggestions are definitely more than welcome, but your threats mean nothing to me, sorry! The chapters _will_ continue to flip-flop between the two (that's the point) up until the moment of reveal. An no, I will _not_ tell you who the actual pairing is because that beats the whole point. The idea is you're _not_ supposed to know until it happens, otherwise, the story is way too predictable. Tbh, I haven't even decided which one would ultimately triumph, so that's still an open debate and I have no answer to tell you.

Bottom line, both ships are _not_ cannon. Its completely fan driven.


	8. Chapter 7: Behind the Stoic Mask

As soon as the _fuuji_ walked out of the door, the silver-haired demon lord walked forward towards the stairs. Half of him wanted to check if the _kaze youkai_ was feeling well, but another half wanted to give her time. He hadn't spoken much with her since Rin joined them and he wanted to ask her perspectives on certain council matters regarding the human healer's presence in the estate but it seemed pretty apparent she wasn't in the mood to talk. So he decided to head to his room, one his father used to own, to rest.

The decrepit staircase creaked and groaned in complaint as a pair of feet came thumping down the ageing stairs. The staircase is battered but beautiful. Although it looks tired and worn down, there are signs of a past full of balls and banquets; scuffed bronze handrails, iron swirled balusters and the patches of polished wood that shines in the soft light. He walked briskly with light footsteps, turning down a candle-lit hall as soon as he reached the top of the steps. He could hear the voices not too far up. _Yuuta and Rin must have been talking_ , he thought. He wasn't too worried - Yuuta always had a fascination with humans, he remembered. Like much of the manor's servants, she didn't think of them like insects or subservient beings - his father, after all, had picked his allies and attendants with humanitarian morals in mind.

* * *

"Are you alright, Lady Rin?"

The news passed through her like a hurricane. It felt to her like everything she had worked and struggled for lay in ruins. The desolation she felt was all consuming. Her mind became an icy wasteland, the wind howled in her soul and wrapped icy tentacles around her heart so tightly it almost stopped beating. _Devastated_ was an understatement: she felt emotionally bankrupt, like there was nothing left to feel, nothing left to say, nothing left but the void that enveloped her mind in swirling blackness.

 _Is this what heartbreak feels like?_ , she wondered.

The sound of the shards of her heart breaking rang loudly in her ears she didn't even hear her companion's question. There was a plethora of shattered bones, burning flesh, and cracked skulls raging in her the depths of her soul and it was pain and painful. Heavy, the air seemed to be as the agonizingly long as minutes drew on. Yuuta hesitantly placed a hand over her should, guiding her forward and breaking her out of whatever trance she had just plunged into, and in that instant, tears burst forth like water from a dam, spilling down her face. The muscles of her chin trembled like a small child and she looked toward the end of the hallway, as if the darkness that lay beyond could soothe her. There was static in her head and she could hear her own sounds, like a distressed child, raw from the inside.

The ice demon didn't know how to react. She wasn't sure what she could have said that could cause such a massive breakdown. Already, the list of possible punishments from the _hone onna_ seemed lengthy. What would the lord think if he found out? Certainly he would-

"Rin."

The sound of his voice snapped Rin's mind back into reality, but it didn't keep her heart from breaking. The walls that held her up just... collapsed. Moment by moment, they fell as her eyes gazed upon his majestic physique, his long silver-hair she had admired over the years, the golden eyes that she dreamed about even when she slept, remembering the feeling of his hands against her cheeks and the soft, cold touch of his lips on her forehead those times he thought she was asleep right before he parts with her little body hidden under the tall brushes with Jakken back when they still traveled together in search of Naraku. The fond memories shattered to a million pieces as she pictured him now, as he stood in front of her, in the arms of another woman, his head buried in her neck as they shared a passionate embrace that she felt certain she would never experience. She trembled in sheer anxiety of it all, even when she pressed her hand against the wall to her side, her body shook from sheer stress.

And for the first time _ever_ , she ignored him.

Her turmoil though, scalded Sesshomaru greatly. He couldn't remember if he had ever seen her cry before; even when he left her at Kaede's village, she didn't cry even when he knew she wanted to. Perhaps that's why she let him leave that day without saying goodbye. This... _new_ Rin was someone he's never known. It was a side of her he's never met, and while part of him is welcomed the thought of knowing more of her than what he already knew, he realized quickly he couldn't stomach the smell of her tears and the sound of the sobs that escaped her lips. His blood boiled at the sight of her disheartened eyes and for a swift moment, he had the mind to kill Yuuta there and then, but flashbacks of the snow woman's cheerful childhood frame handing his lonesome, younger self an ice flower on his birthday no one had celebrated with him kept the murderous thoughts at bay. His rational mind could tell Rin wasn't _hurt_ , and whatever the _yuki onna_ might have said was likely not spoken in spite.

Yuuta kept her head bowed in his presence - both in reference and apology. She had backed away a few steps keeping her head low but had dared not move since without his command.

"Rin."

It wasn't like him to _ever_ repeat himself, but this was an exception. She wasn't hearing him. He reached a clawed hand to her shoulder in a futile effort to calm her nerves-

 _SLAP!_

His golden eyes widened in a mixture of shock and surprise and the fleeting second in which his gaze met Rin's, he saw an equal amount of surprise in her face. She had slapped his hand away unconsciously and he could see the terror of regret paint itself across her face. But that regret was only momentary - he had only hit the tip of the iceberg.

Rin stayed rooted to the spot, her own heavy breathing moving her hair softly away from the cheekbones that had become so much more prominent over the previous weeks. Her features buckled just slightly in momentum as she opened her lips to speak but held her tongue at the very last second, only highlighting the betrayal of her grief.

What was there for her to say? He was free to do as he wishes! He was a demon, and a lord to top it off! Whatever pent up jealousy she had wasn't his fault, and yet she blamed him for it. She had a perfect, pure image of him in her mind that was broken to pieces at the knowledge of his relationship with Kagura and some parts of her screamed irrationally, _demanding_ his love - for him to pick _her_. She loved him. But it felt to her like he treated her like a stranger: her thoughts are a strange ocean to him like the churning of her mind were petty words, fluff and never substance. He kept his thought on guard, hardly ever letting an unconsidered word escape his lips. He left her on the outside, rarely granting a glimpse of where his emotions really lie. And at that instant, it was all too much for her to handle.

"Why didn't you tell me about Kagura?"

Each word was thrown out of her mouth without her consent, venom ticked at the corner of her lips. Her voice was hard and cold, the cold ice creeping at the edge of her heart pounding at her very being.

Why _didn't_ her tell her? He wondered too. Was it because he knew, deep inside, that this was how she was going to react? If so, then why did he go ahead and did it anyway? What was his reason? What was the core of it all? As usual, she threw him questions he didn't know how answer, except this time, he knew very well this wasn't something he could just put side and pretend she never asked. Her brown eyes was lit with a fire he's never seen in her before; there lies passion, devastation, _destruction_.

"I didn't know I _had_ to."

His stoic facade was plastered on like it always was - unbreaking, apathetic, and absolute. For the first time ever, she hated it. His voice was cold and emotionless as if he didn't even empathize with her aching heart. His eyes were calculating and she could see those golden hues analyze her every move, seemingly trying to comprehend her breakdown - all without giving away even the slightest hint of his own feelings about it. It was frustrating trying to break down his walls just to see something remotely genuine in his impassive demeanor.

 _How come he let Kagura in so easily and not me?_

"You didn't _have_ to. But it would have been common courtesy to do so."

Her voice shook, the thwarting resentment boiling her blood spilled on every detail of her actions to the very words that fell out of her lips.

"And why is that?"

 _Are you stupid?!_

Her fingers curled tightly into a fist with blanched knuckles, nails digging deeply into the palms of her hand. He was so close on the uptake it's quite unbelievable, shocking really. As much as she tried to hold it in, the pain came out like an uproar from her throat in the form of the truth she never had the courage to say in the last decade since she's known him.

"Because _I love you_! And I can live with you not feeling the same way about me, but the least you could do was give me closure!"

The beads of water started falling down one after another, without a sign of stopping. She hit the wall and tried to scream, but her voice was melted by the sound of the place. The muffled sobs wracked against her chest.

He stood there in silence, motionless. To be honest, he _didn't_ know what to say or do. At the back of his mind, he knew it all along but he chose to push it back and forget it, to ignore the subtle hints she drops every time they speak. He _loved_ her too but at that moment, he wasn't quite sure what kind of love it was: did he love her like family? Or perhaps something else? And frankly, he knew he was hesitant to find out. What would he even do if he found out? Would he pursue her like his father did Izayoi? What of his rank, his council, his estates? They would oppose a human bride the same way they did his father. There was too much at stake and he wasn't sure he was ready to face it all. He just wanted to keep the normalcy going; to see her smile next to him, hear the sounds of her musical laughter. Ignorance _is_ a bliss, after all.

But the guilt came to haunt his take in a breath. It was ice in his guts and it felt like it could be a hundred degrees out and he'd still be frozen on the inside.

He turned to the _yuki onna_ that still stood on his far right, head bowed.

"Leave."

She bowed slightly lower in acknowledgement before turning her heels and vanishing down the hall.

The silence that came after was heavy. Rin had made her big declaration of love, the grand speech she had been rehearsing for a fortnight wound up unused; her impulsive decision to blurt it all out had now caused the still silence to lay on her skin like poison. It seeped into her blood and paralyzed her brain, her pupils became dilated and there was a tremor in her hands. It gnawed at her insides, like a gaping void, needing to be filled with sounds, words, anything. The silence was torturous in it's nothingness, cruelly underscoring how vapid their conversation had become. The silence was eerily unnatural, like a dawn devoid of birdsong. Finally, she spoke again, intent on shattering the glass wall slowly building itself up between them.

"Lord Sesshomaru, I'm sorry I-"

Her words were cut short, locked stranded in her throat as he cut her of with his lips brushing against hers. Not innocently, like a tease but hot, fiery, passionate and demanding. In that split second, his tall physique was looming over her, muscular arms pressed against the wall behind her, trapping her willowy body against his chest. For a second, she felt like she wanted to pull away before she lost herself but she couldn't seem to… In this minty moment, her senses had been seduced and she felt as if she could no longer think straight.

"Rin...", he whispered slowly as he pulled back just slightly, prolonging each letter as if to savor them. His forehead rested against hers, their nose almost touched in the proximity of their faces.

This time, his face was... different. She had never seen him without that indomitable mask but at that moment, it was gone. He had the expression of any normal man, his eyes seemed lonely and his face bore marks of clear confusion. He was vulnerable and for the first time, he was letting her see that - his truest, deepest emotions. Every bit of anger that squeezed like a vice on her heart let go. She couldn't bear watching the silver-hair demon's turmoil paint itself on his perfect face; it didn't belong there.

She leaned forward to kissed him and the world fell away. It was slow and soft, comforting in ways that words would never be. He pulled his hand from the wall behind her, resting it right below her ear, his thumb caressing her cheek as their breaths mingled. She ran her fingers down his spine, pulling him closer until there was no space left between them and she could feel the beating of his heart against her chest. Her wet face soaked his white kimono as her tears seeped through the thin garment. His hand drifted to her hip. It settled there and pulled her even closer. She inhaled sharply. She was pressed tightly against his warm chest, chiseled to perfection. _Must he be so perfect?_ She splayed her hand against it, intending to push him away, but instead she left it there. His breathing quickened as did hers. He began nuzzling her neck with delicate kisses so faint, they were whispers.

They stayed like that for what felt like such a long time though it was only mere minutes. No words were exchanged; they've said all they needed with minimal talking and the apologies were accepted. Though there are many questions still left unanswered, they've resigned to save them for another day.

Finally, he pulled back, a clawed hand caressing the side of her face and a longing look in his eyes. He looked straight into her deep, brown eyes with uncertainty. He wiped the remainder of her tears off her cheeks in soft, gentle strokes, so unnatural to a demon like himself.

"Rin."

"Yes, my lord?"

There was silence for a moment, a solemn pause, before he spoke again.

"I can't give you the answer you want just yet. When I find out, you'll be the first to know."

She faked a smile in response. It hurt her and he knew but telling her something he wasn't sure would be true would be far worse. The top row of teeth was showing, and there was a faint curve to the lips, but there was no crease below the eyes, no movement of the cheeks. But he chose to ignore it. He _had_ to.

"Thank you..."

She understood where he was coming from. She knew. When Kohaku told her he loved her, she had felt the same: uncertain and unsure, confused. They spent a great deal of time together after the _daiyoukai_ had left her in the village and to some extent, she felt the feeling of love was mutual: but it just wasn't the same _kind_ of love. She cared for him like a brother - a best friend at best. He knew all her secrets as bland as they were, her little joys and heartbreaks, every little pet peeve and quirks. In some ways, he knew her better than her lord probably did. They didn't interact as openly after all. Knowing he loved her outside a platonic context confused her for days and week after. She _loved_ him too - but it just wasn't the same. And deep inside, Rin feared Sesshomaru's response would be a lot like her's to the demon slayer. And the sheer thought of it shattered her to the core, but that wasn't something up to her to decide. She could only help him realize how he truly feels by showing him she wasn't the same child anymore: she was a woman now - stronger, better, different.

There was understanding in their eyes as they looked at each other, savoring the honest moments for they knew it was about to end. Pulling his hand away from her face, he reached out for her hand, entwining her fingers on his own as he began to walk forward, the stoic mask back on his face. Holding hands, he led her down the long corridors to find her temporary room.

* * *

A/N: Next chapter would be out next week. I'll be in Illinois this weekend so I won't be doing much writing on the road, unfortunately. I'll probably have it done by the middle of the week or so. Somewhere around then. Thanks for all the reviews out there! I really do appreciate it!


	9. Chapter 8: Uncertain Hearts

The sky rumbled, and heavy rain bounced off the beaten slates that covered the half decaying rooftops. A storm smothered the setting sun, graying the world around his sullen estate. The trees stood as if charcoal against the deep blue sky. Drops of rain beat against the ancient manor like hammers, creating an atmosphere that mirrored the _youkai's_ current state of mind.

The demon lord _always_ liked to be in control - and for once, he isn't. There was a feeling of devastation gnawing in his heart; Rin's tearful face replaying in his mind like an old, broken record. Her words were sincere and heartfelt and it made him happy - relieved, but it also made him feel a level of dismay.

 _Why?_

The desolation he felt as soon as she left his presence was all consuming. His mind wanted to become an icy wasteland, the wind howled in his soul and wrapped icy tentacles around his heart so tightly it almost stopped beating. His mouth felt dry as he let out a shaky breath, his weary eyes gazing at nothingness in deep thought. He could feel the pulse pounding in his temples as the foreboding silence rang loud in his mind. Fragments of thought, splinters of words, and droplets of silence spun into a kaleidoscopic jumble, shifted infinitesimally, and fell into a new pattern.

 _Was it because his lack of a response made her hurt?,_ he wasn't sure.

More importantly, he wasn't sure _why_ he lacked a response. She never left his mind after all of those years apart; she was always there - mentally if not physically. It's just incomprehensible. He had secretly admired everything about her, from the way the breeze blew her hair to the soft lilt to her voice. She was unfailingly kind, always putting others first and herself last. She was his one stable force, his one stability in a world filled with chaos and he so desperately needed that in his life, and yet here he was, stunned at her confession.

His room was gold with beautiful murals on the wall, hand painted skillfully by someone who obviously knew what they were doing. The scene is of the old demon festivals held in honor of his father's legacies, crafted skillfully into the walls to tell the tale of his glory even in his slumber. By the flickering yellow of the nearby torch, the room was dark, the shapes of the furniture discernible but the colors were so muted that they are almost grey. Despite that, the walls were still are like nothing else - vibrant and strong - much like the man their stories told about. It was a magnificent sight to see, even with age creeping along the crevices and cracks on old wood and stone and the apparent smell of wet moss that lingered even this far into the mansion.

The demon lord wore a plain black, silk _kimono_ \- his obi loosely tied around his waist, paired with a textured gray _hakama_. It was an uncharacteristic attire for him as an adult having always been donned in his signature white _hakama_ , but it carried the nostalgia of his long forgotten childhood. It was an old garment of his father's, tailored to fit his similar physique when he inherited the estate. As he sat at the corner of his huge bed, he absentmindedly dug his nails against the silken mattress. The comforter was thick and irresistibly soft like a billowing cloud, calling for his fatigued body to rest, but his stress left him on edge, his mind struggling to grasp unfamiliar emotions. His muscles slouched and his heart beat slowly.

 _Did his father ever felt this way too?,_ he wondered.

He had set his eyes dead ahead onto the covered windows, seemingly staring into nothingness, mesmerized by the way the torchlight played on the creases of the old, blackout curtain to create dappled shade. All the while, he kept replaying the previous events in his mind, pondering on questions he never once though to ask himself before.

 _How did he truly feel about his human ward?_

He had always found excuses as to why he wanted to take her back, but beyond all pretenses, what was his real motive to wanting her near? Somewhere, deep inside, he recalled her bright smiles, her joyous, innocent laughter. He looked back to the days where he _longed_ to see her after long months of travelling alone. In her embrace, it felt as it the world stopped still on its axis. There was no time, no wind, no rain. Sesshomaru's mind was at peace. In the most hidden parts of his heart, he knew - he's _always_ known - _he loved her_. And this love was pure. Unselfish. Undemanding. Free. But what _kind_ of love was it? Did he love her like his father loved Izayoi? Or perhaps he loved her the way his mother _cared_ for him? He wasn't certain - Sesshomaru had been too unfamiliar with love in the centuries he's lived to differentiate one from the other, but despite that, knowing for certain she loved him back felt like bliss.

 _But... why then, did he feel a lack of resolve to accept her feelings completely?_

A knock on the his door jolted the silver-haired daiyoukai back to reality. Without even waiting for his response, the big wooden double-doors that barred him from the desolate halls outside pushed open, and for a second, his heart was caught in his chest, half-hoping and half-fearing seeing his human ward peek through the slight gap, but alas, it wasn't her.

"Expecting someone else?"

Kagura's jet black hair was tucked in her everyday bun - the giant contrast of her dark locks against her pale skin made her look stunningly haunting. Unlike her usual attire, she forwent her usual kimono in lieu of simply her simple green _kosode,_ her yellow obi tied stylishly on her waist. Without the loose fit of her everyday _kimono_ , her feminine figure showed clearly through the thin layers of cloth that covered her curves. Pressing her body through the small slit she made through the old entryway, she entered his room with hesitation - uninterested in asking his permission or waiting for his invitation.

 _Typical._

By candlelight her bones looked sharp, yet her skin is mellow like a peach. In the dimness, her eyes turned from their dark red hue to almost black, each pupil quite undetectable.

Ignoring her question, he watched her silently as she pushed the old blocks of carved wood shut behind her, the memories of their previous... _escapades_ flooding his mind. In that moment, the turmoil in his heart quieted themselves, as if waiting impatiently for something else to happen - forgetting in that very instance, Rin. The _fuuji_ walked lightly towards his bed, her light footsteps making the wooden planks beneath her feet creak under the heavy carpet that draped upon the decrepit base flooring. Stopping short a few feet from where he sat, she crossed her arms across her chest, her right hand clutching that white, traditional wooden fan she favored so much loosely. Her sly smirk was the same as it's always been - impudent, cocky, and audacious. Whatever sullied her mood earlier had obviously been wiped off for the evening, and her presence, albeit unsolicited, felt strangely comforting.

"How long are you _really_ intending to stay here? The imp had been talking about an uprising from remnants of the Southern Kingdoms that needs quelling pretty soon. Can't imagine you'd be taking _her_ along for the ride, so what's your plan?"

Gold eyes eyed her coolly - his unruffled expression shielding away restlessness.

"We leave tomorrow."

" _We?_ You seriously thinking of bringing her?"

The wind sorceress raised an eyebrow, regarding him in blatant disbelief - mild disappointment painting itself through a small frown on her lips. He didn't respond.

"Look, I'm not going to tell you what to do, but taking her would be much more than a hassle. If you really have to be attached to her by the hip, then let me handle the rebels alone. I can deal with low lives like them pretty easily without you having to be around. I _was_ Naraku's right hand, at one point-"

She raised her free hand from her chest, waving at him dismissively as she continued their one-sided conversation - an arrogant act of informality that warranted an icy glare from the young lord.

"-so I'll head over and handle them myself first thing tomorrow. It shouldn't take too long. Besides-"

She began to turn around and trot back towards the door, "-I'm sure you have other business you'd rather attend to."

It was slight, but he caught it. Their eyes met in the middle of her last sentence, the gaze of her deep red eyes conveying so much than her words. In that second, he could see it clearly: the insatiable fire that burned within her, evident in the way her hand clenched tightly as it dropped to her leg, her knuckles white from the pressure of her ungodly grip. Her pupils dilated, her posture tightened. Her thoughts were like a strange, dark ocean to him, but he could almost taste her bitterness in the air as she dropped the words like a sharp blade aimed at his soul and for a _very_ short moment, he caught the grimace at the corner of her lips; the familiar scorn of a broken heart, but the second he saw it all, they were gone - just as swiftly as they appeared.

"Kagura."

She didn't turn around or acknowledged him, and right there, the replay of the day's earlier events emerged in his mind at the most inconvenient of times. He could feel the familiar, ominous tension swarming the air, and before Sesshomaru even realized what he was doing, his grip had tightened over her small wrist, drawing her to a stop. She titled her small body to face him, her blood-red eyes returning his very own, piercing stare. There was static - that crackling in the air that's always happened whenever the two of them got within a foot of each other.

Her stoic mask, calm and collected just as his was, was placed neatly on her face, veiling the freezing hostility of the jealousy that reared its head just moments ago.

"What are you doing?"

Her voice gave nothing away - poised and composed, without a single crack to her typical smug tone. For a second, a heavy silence settled over them, thicker than the uneasy tension in the atmosphere. The silence was a poison to them, for in that void of sound the shallowness of their conversation was laid bare.

As if on a trance, Sesshomaru voicelessly followed the instinct that pounded on his head, on a curious endeavor to find out some answers.

 _He had to know._

His anticipation was a nervous kind of energy. It tingled through him like electrical sparks on the way to the ground, gathering in his toes. Wordlessly, he took a few steps closer and in one, swift motion, he leaned in, pressing his lips against hers. She smelt of fresh herbs and peppermint, indicating a bath not too long ago.

 _Why had he not been able to accept Rin?_

Unlike their previous _encounters_ , this kiss was different. Different from their typical fiery, passionate and demanding, this one was innocent, soft and slow. Recovering from her own surprise, the _kaze youkai_ parted her own lips, savoring the moment she knew would never last. Their breaths mingled and the world fell away, the taste of her lips, he realized, was becoming both his salvation and torment. His free hand wrapped around her waist and hers locked around his neck pulling him down slightly - her fan still clutched tightly in an iron grip.

 _Kagura..._

It was unlike in plays or stories. There were no fireworks for them, no music in the background, but even so, as he pulled away from his sudden, uncharacteristic _assault_ on her heart, he found the disarming answer he was looking for. They stood there, eyes locked at each other - all charades and veneers aside - realizing the dawning truth of just what kind of alarming situation he had just fallen into.

He could see her clearly now; Kagura had a kind of understated beauty or perhaps it was her charm - her being so disarmingly unaware of her prettiness. She was sarcastic, crude, impolite, and she hardly ever smiled - but when she did and when she laughed, he couldn't help but smile along too, even if it was just on the inside. To be in her company was felt as if he too were _someone -_ not just another figurehead in one, big political agenda, that he had been warmed in summer rays regardless of the season. What drove others away and what inadvertently drew him closer was her inability to sugar coat anything. Her emotions were not easily hidden on her prideful face, her feelings were evident in the crease of her lovely brow and the curve of her full lips, her eyes showed her soul. They were a deep pool of restless red, an ocean of fire and ardor. As he looked into her eyes he felt like all the beauty of the universe could not even hope to compete with this simple thing: passion. Passion turned her eyes into orbs of the brightest flames, and in them he read clearly that she would fight to the very last blood for her life. She was not one to let the world break her. Sure she could cry, but she would never let them take her true self from her. She clung to it with passion - the passion that made her even more beautiful.

He gingerly released his rigid grasp on her wrist, letting her hand drop back to her side as he turned around to walk back to the comforts of his bed, his impassive facade already drawn back on his expressions. He guarded his thoughts, never letting an unconsidered word escape his lips.

"I will handle the uprising myself tomorrow. There is no need for you to get involved. Inform Rin we will be postponing our travels until the rebels have been fully dealt with."

It took the _fuuji_ longer to regain her composure, but she did so promptly, nonetheless. She scurried to the door, her hurried steps giving away her flustered reaction.

"I won't be babysitting her, if that's what you're asking."

And with that, she shut the door behind them, leaving the silver-haired lord to himself, alone with his newfound realizations.

 _And I suppose now I know._

He walked briskly yet gracefully towards the bright torch that illuminated the room. The air was still and the flames barely flickered. With each stride, his mind became more clear, more resolute, as if the growing physical distance between them had now become an emotional chasm. The sun had set and the windows - barred by old, dusty curtains that had hardly been opened for years - showed but a glimpse of the darkening skies outside as the evening progressed. Then, abruptly pausing to close his eyes and take in a deep breath of dewy air, he steeled himself to only think of his future from here on in. With a quick wave of his hand, the firelight dies, leaving behind a shimmer of smoke and ashes, drenching the room in complete darkness. He felt as if his insides were tearing, his pale skin looked even paler as blood drained from his face. His eyes were cold like ice and his features immobile. And there, standing in the pool of swirling blackness, he pondered at the dreadful fruit of his most recent experiment.

Kisses, to him, were usually inconsequential, but as the memory of both women's lips still lingered on his own, Sesshomaru was thankful for the pitch black twilight that obscured the vulnerability brought about his now dawning conclusions; Rin was his sun, bright and alluring - illuminating parts of him he had never known to exist, thawing the cold, frozen bits of his heart that had long been encased in a thick layer of ice. She was the spring that bloomed a meadow of daisies where it was once to dead to grow love, but Kagura - she was his moon, dark and mysterious. The one who sees and accepts the tainted parts of him - his darker, crueler reality. She was his solace, the one who accepts the shadows that plagued his past and the ones that will come in the future. She was his equal, someone who could stand by him and against him - cold, cunning, and daring.

 _He had fallen for them both_.

* * *

A/N: It took so long to make an update. I've just been _suuuuuuper_ busy IRL in the last year, I have had no time to come back, but rest assured, I will be here every now and then to post more updates. I have not dropped this project, just to get that out of the way! Thanks for all the people who continually wrote to me and PMed me, awaiting more of my work. You guys are the best!


End file.
